


Getting to Memphis

by ilikegoo



Category: The Newsroom (US TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, My First Work in This Fandom, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-12
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-02-01 06:00:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 38,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21408238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ilikegoo/pseuds/ilikegoo
Summary: She didn't know she was pregnant when she left and she doesn't know what that means now she's back. My take on the "What if Mac was pregnant when she broke up with Will" story and how this would change the course of the series.
Relationships: Will McAvoy/MacKenzie McHale
Comments: 95
Kudos: 86





	1. Northwestern

**Author's Note:**

> Rewatched the series, an idea stuck in my head. It wouldn't go away. I've wrtitten the first four chapters. I hope you enjoy them.
> 
> All dialogue lifted from the series property of Aaron Sorkin and HBO, I'm just borrowing it.

_ **Northwestern** _

“I never called Obama a socialist!” Lewis shouted and then began bickering with Sharon over what does and doesn’t constitute a socialist. ‘He looks bored’ she thought but she knew really, he was just trying to not scream and maybe he was a little bored. It’s an argument that had been had before. As the argument about paying for the fire department began she watched him pinch the bridge of his nose ‘Come on Billy. Bite at something.’ She willed him.

  
Suddenly his eyes found hers ‘Crap.’ She didn’t want him to see her, he wasn’t supposed to know she was there. She smiled softly at him and poured a thousand apologies in to one look. It was the first time in years she’d looked him in the eye and there was a sadness she hadn’t seen before it was so much worse than the looks of contempt, he had in his eyes during his news broadcasts. She’d watched a few, a lot if she was being honest, since they’d broken up. Mostly it was a form of self-torture to watch what’d he become without her, she knew it was because she’d hurt him, made him feel unloved meaning he had to seek that love from somewhere else, his audience.

  
“Hi I’m Jenny and I’m a sophomore and this is for all three of you.” Mac sat up as she saw the girl, she prayed her gamble would pay off. “Can you say why America is the greatest country in the world?”

  
“Freedom and Freedom. Let’s keep it that way” Lewis said and Mac’s eyes rolled so hard she swore she could see her own spine ‘Please. Please. Please.’ She prayed.

  
“The New York Jets.” He smiled wryly like his answer was some kind of private joke meanwhile she screamed internally. ‘God damn it McAvoy.” She got out her note pad and scribbled as his eyes again found hers as the debate host forced him to answer and he again found her in the audience and suddenly the look changed, he tried to pass off an answer about Madison, the declaration of independence and the Constitution. She held her notepad so he could see it.

  
“It’s not the greatest country in the world professor and that’s my answer.”

  
’Well that was unintended’ She thought as he shouted “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about” at a college student.

  
Later that evening she flew back to DC and cracked open the bedroom door. The glow of the nightlight illuminating the small figure. She moved in the room and stroked his blonde hair, eyes cracking open and a little blue orbs staring sleepily at her “Mummy?”


	2. Deciding To

** Deciding To **

** _Will _ **

He was angry, he always seemed to be angry or at least he had been for the last three years, perhaps he should go see Abe he’s been paying the man for years for an appointment he never keeps. He listened to Ellen, no Karen _‘Shit she just told me her name’ _he thought tell him that Charlie needed to see him. She wasn’t telling him everything, Will got the distinct impression that she knew exactly where his staff was. He internalised the profanity he felt like screaming, she looked young this what’s-her-name, he’s shouted at enough young women recently and as nice as his two-week vacation was, he just wanted to get back to work.

So, he went upstairs to see Charlie, the receptionist telling him that he could go straight in, he listened whilst Charlie told him some story about a woman falling in to his lap in Vietnam, there was probably some meaning to it but Will didn’t get it. He allowed Charlie to drag him to the executive dining room for a drink after he found out where and why his staff went away. “It’s your personality” Don Keefer had told him and it had hurt, all he wants is to be liked and loved.

Charlie cut his rant off as going on about being a nice guy, Charlie knew he was a nice guy once and if it all went to plan maybe he’d be a nice guy again.

“I hired a new EP for you” He told Will in a sing song voice.

“What do you mean?” Will was baffled.

“I hired you a new EP.” Charlie stated again.

‘_Keep it calm McAvoy’ _Will told himself “I’m never going on vacation again” What the hell was Charlie up to “You hired a new EP without me meeting him?”

“Her.”

“You hired a new EP without me meeting her?” Will corrected on autopilot.

“No. You’ve met her.” Charlie was trying not to show how much he was enjoying this.

“Who?” Will asked before the light bulb slowly stared to flicker on. “Charlie. Have you hired, to run my show, without consulting…” Will was doing his best to not get angry.

“You were unreachable. Only one person knew how to get in touch with you…” Charlie was tormenting him now.

“IT WAS YOU!!” Will shouted not really listening as Charlie went on about righting the ship.

“You’re not talking about Mackenzie?” He just needed him to confirm it.

“Line up 10 people and 8 will tell you she’s the best EP in the business and the other 2 will be stupid.” Charlie snapped at him.

“I’m one of the 8” Will admitted, sure he was mad as hell at her but he wasn’t stupid enough to say she was bad at her job and then he was baffled by the fact he didn’t have contractual approval, well he was sure as shit going to go fix that.

“Will?!” Charlie called to him as he stormed out the room “When was the last time you saw her?”

He thought for a second, a painful memory of their last conversation flashed briefly “I don’t know about three years ago.”

“Coincidentally, that was the last time you were a nice guy” Charlie yelled at him. Will knew he was right. There was no point arguing he walked out.

**Mac **

She carried her luggage past the picture of him on the wall, she was nervous. She wasn’t expecting their reunion to go well, she didn’t think he recognised her at Northwestern, he’d also made it pretty clear he never wanted to see or speak to her ever again.

The newsroom was empty, she was surprised. She found a staffer who after a moment who after a realised who she was and then accidentally admitted Will had gone down to his agent’s office.

“I’m sorry” The young woman said “I gave too much away.”

“Let me try to guess at something and you tell me how close I am to being right. This whole move was done behind Will’s back and, he just found out now and has gone to his agents office to see why he doesn’t have approval?”

“Um hmm.” Maggie confirmed her suspicions.

She sat down and waited for her fate, offered advice to Maggie regarding her relationship troubles, promoted her, although she wasn’t sure if she’d have a job by the end of the day and then hurricane Jim rushed into the newsroom.

She watched as he tripped on her bags “Jim! That’s Louis Vuitton luggage!”

He was panicking like her he hadn’t known that Will did not know they were hired although somehow he’d managed to find out there was some history between them.

“Why are you scared of Will McAvoy?” He demanded.

It hit a little too close to home “Hey jugghead. I’m not scared of anything except Jellyfish which is perfectly normal!” She was willing to admit she was scared of seeing Will again.

“Tell me what the problem is with you and Will.” He asked.

“I can’t.” She wanted to but she couldn’t and then he walked in.

It was the closest she’d been to him in years and she froze like a deer in headlights as he stopped in front of her. “Hi Will. It’s good to see you.” She said softly and introduced Jim, all the while he stood there staring at her, anger and betrayal in his eyes.

“Let’s go in my office.”

“Sure.” She followed him.

“I tried to get in touch while you were on vacation…Actually I’ve tried to get in touch with you a lot in the last three years. Did you get all those emails?” She was afraid of the answer.

“Yeah.” He said and there was a pain in her heart, surely he hadn’t just ignored what she’d put in them? 

“What did you think?” She almost didn’t want to ask.

“I didn’t read them.” She made sure she didn’t let out the sigh of relief.

“I understand. There’s no need to apologise.” She needed him to know that now because when he found out she just knew it would tear him apart.

She was trying to convince him that this was going to work and then he told her “It’s not a three-year contract.”

_‘What the fuck?’ _She thought

“It’s a 156-week contract that gives me the opportunity to fire you 155 times at the end of each week.”

‘_Jesus how did he pull that off?’ _

“I gave some money back off my salary” He answered her question

“How much?” How much was he willing to pay for revenge?

“One million dollars a year.” He said it like it was nothing.

“You paid a million dollars just to fire me whenever you want?” Did he really hate her that much?

“Three million dollars.” He corrected “And not whenever I want. Just at the end of each week.”

“How the hell much money do you get paid?” She couldn’t help the question coming out.

She couldn’t believe he’d done this to her, well she could, what she did to him was awful and he had every right to never forgive her.

“If you’d read any of my emails or answered any of my calls you know I take responsibility for everything that happened”

“I already did know that and I don’t care.” The tone of voice told her he meant it.

“I’m sorry.”

“Are you?” He sounded tired.

“YES!” How could he think she was anything other than sorry?

She called him on his sarcastic response to her apology, so she decided to focus on securing the jobs of the people who followed her.

**Will**

His hands were shaking as he pulled off the wrapping on his suit. Was he seriously about to do this?

He lowered himself into the chair in the studio “Oh Will…” He heard her in his ear, convinced letting her do this was a mistake but knowing it was probably going to be the best thing that ever happened.

“Don’t talk to me unless you absolutely have to.” She could produce his show all she wanted but he didn’t want to talk to her anymore than he had to.

“I absolutely have to” She responded. “I thought this would be good time to get a couple of things straight.”

Was she out of her mind? He was about to go on TV and she wanted to get things straight? What the hell did she think they’d been doing in her office all afternoon? There was nothing to get straight.

“That’s funny, I think this is the best time to get a couple of things straight”

“Can people hear me in there?” He hoped the answer was no.

“Now they can.” What was she playing at?

“So I did a terrible thing and I don’t expect you to forgive me…”

“Take me off.” He demanded.

“You’ve got my contract…”

“Take me off!” He was getting louder

“But between 8 and 9 o’clock I own you.” Was she out of her damn mind? He couldn’t wait to fire her. “Now say I understand so I can get these guys a sound level.”

“I don’t see it working that way.” He wasn’t going to play her game.

“Ok.” Was she giving up that easily. “Will check out your preview screen.”

He looked _Vertigo Medicine with Will McAvoy. _Apparently, she wasn’t giving up that easily.

“GET IT OFF THERE!!” Like Louisiana if his luck stayed the same that was going to be broadcast live to millions.

“Has someone invited a way to digitally store images?”

“YOUTUBE! YOUTUBE! GET IT DOWN!!” He yelled.

“Well now you’re just a crazy guy shouting YouTube! Say I understand.” God she was infuriating.

“I understand.” He caved. That’s one to Mac.

“You warmed up or you want to screw around some more?” She was fucking with him. She had to be fucking with him.

“I’m good.” He snapped.

He took some deep breathes and composed himself whilst the intro played.

“Good Evening I’m Will McAvoy…”

**Mac**

“Yo!” She heard him call, watched as he approached Maggie “Your name is Margret Jordan.” She was proud of him, it was his way of saying good job.

She waited outside his office “Can I talk to you a second?” She asked him as he was leaving.

“8 to 9 is over.” He walked straight past her.

She managed to catch him at the elevator after he tried to thank the wrong control room.

“You were perfect, I wanted to thank you.” She told him as she reminisced about the first time he met her parents, she didn’t expect him to remember. Why would he?

Then he surprised her, he remembered the score, the conversation and showing up to dinner drunk. She was blown away, she couldn’t think of anything to say other than “You two idiots were drunk when you met us for dinner?”

“Yeah” He laughed, it was the first time in three years she’d heard him laugh. “Your dad’s doing alright?” Obviously, he’d heard about his minor heart attack and she nodded.

And then when she didn’t think she could be more surprised “Charlie says your physically and mentally exhausted.” It almost sounded like he cared.

“I’ve been exhausted since I was 30.” She knew she had to tell him why.

He was about to get in the elevator when he turned back “It wasn’t vertigo medicine.” She snapped her head back. “I thought I saw you in the audience. It’s how I got flustered, I thought I saw you in the audience but it turned out to be someone else.” The door closed, she hit the button trying to get the door open again.

This was her moment, another elevator door opened, and she got in. She went down to the lobby and saw him stood outside talking to his fans.

“Will!” She called as he signed his last autograph and went towards his car. _‘Now or never McHale.’ _She thought and she ran as fast as her heels could carry her, managing to grab the door handle as he went to close it. She slipped in the car.

“I need to tell you something.”


	3. Sins of the Father

** Sins of the Father **

“What the hell are you doing?” Will demanded.

“Mr McAvoy sir?” The driver asked.

“We weren’t finished with our conversation Will.” Mac told him.

“8 and 9” He reminded her.

“Screw 8 and 9.” She snapped “There’s something I need to tell you.”

“Mac, I’m tired.” He pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Please. This needs to happen, it’s something that should’ve happened three years ago.”

“Mr McAvoy is everything ok?” Will’s driver asked “Do I need to call the cops?”

‘_Please.’ _Will thought but decided against expressing that particular thought “No, it’s ok. She works for me.” He looked at Mackenzie “What?”

“Not here.” She said softly “Ummm, sorry I don’t know your name…” She said to the driver.

“Tom.” He responded.

“Tom if I give you an address can you take us there? Wait outside, for a while?” She asked

“Mr McAvoy?” Tom asked

“Sure. Why not.” Will gave up and Mac gave her address, they rode in awkward silence. They didn’t say a word as they walked into Mac’s building and into her apartment, Will wondering what game she was trying to play.

“I need to show you…” She wouldn’t meet his eye. “I shouldn’t have waited. I knew you were ignoring the emails and the calls and that rejection hurt Will…”

“It wasn’t exactly a painless experience for me either Mackenzie.” There was no emotion in his response.

“I understood why you rejected me. I really do but I couldn’t bare if you rejected…” She trailed off.

“What are you talking about?” He demanded, today had been draining. She was draining.

“Follow me.” She led him around the boxes and down a corridor pushing open a door.

There in the middle of a bed surrounded by boxes was a small lump and Will’s heart skipped three beats.

“This is Benjamin.” She said softly.

He just stared.

“He’s two and he’s just like you.” Mac said the fear evident. “He’s so smart Billy but…” she chuckled “Has this temper…”

“What the fuck Mac?” He hissed.

“I tried to…” She was

“Not hard enough.” He snapped.

“No.” She whispered at him. “Not here.” She closed the door and walked back down the corridor.

“Ms McHale is that you?” A young woman poked her head out of another room.

“Yeah Sophie, sorry to disturb you.” Mac said softly. Sophie’s eyes met her and Mac offered a soft smile to say everything’s ok although she didn’t know if it would be.

They went back down the hall and Mac led him into the kitchen, she pulled out two glasses and a bottle of scotch and poured them both a drink.

“I did try Will.” She said after taking a mouthful.

“I sent emails and I called.” She reminded him. “You chose not to look at them.”

He knew she was right. “Well when that didn’t work why didn’t you come see me?”

“Would you have even opened the door?” She fired back.

_‘Probably not’_ He thought, and her eyes met his and she knew the answer.

“Do you think I wanted to keep this from you?” She asked, “Do you think I wanted to do it alone?” She snapped.

“Then you should have told me!” He yelled “Found a way to get me to listen!”

“Would it have changed anything Will?” She said voice devoid of emotion.

“Jesus Mac.” He was furious “How many more ways can you find to betray me?”

“I didn’t betray you on this one Will!” She fired back. “You ignored me.”

He knew she was right, deep down he knew it. “You kept a child from me.”

“You kept him from yourself because you couldn’t bring yourself to open a damn email!”

“And why was that? What could have possibly made me want to cut you out of my life?”

“You think I don’t understand that?” She snapped, he was hurting but so was she “But it’s not like I sent you one fucking email!” She’d sent hundreds.

“Mummy?” A small voice cut through the room and they both looked down. It was the first time Will really looked at the child. The messy blonde hair, the blue eyes looking at both of them in fear “Mummy, yelling.” He mumbled.

“I’m sorry.” The anger immediately disappeared and she went to the little boy dragging a comfort blanket in one hand. She scooped him up and sat him on her hip. “Do you want some milk?” She asked and he shook his head. “How about a cuddle?” She squeezed him tight and he again shook his head.

“Scary” The little voice whispered, and Will felt his heat break. Suddenly he was cast back to Nebraska listening to his own parents yell at each other.

“I’m sorry honey.” She kissed him on the head and turned to face Will.

Suddenly two identical sets of blue eyes met each other. “TV Daddy” Ben said looking at him.

Will tore his eyes from the child and looked at Mac not even needing to answer the question.

“Yeah honey, TV Daddy. He came to visit like I told you.” The little boy smiled and like the grinch Will’s heart grew three sizes. “Shall we go back to bed?” She asked him and he nodded yawning.

“Will can you wait a few minutes?” She asked and Will nodded. Whilst she was gone he called down to his driver and told him to go. This conversation was going to last a number of hours.

Mac came back without the child and Will had to admit he was disappointed.

“TV Daddy?” Will asked.

“Just because you didn’t know about him, doesn’t mean he doesn’t know about you.” Mac said, the anger coming back.

He rubbed his face in his hands. “From the beginning then Mac.” He didn’t want to get angry again the fear he saw in the child softened him slightly.

“I was pregnant when we broke up.” She stated, he tried not to sarcastically respond that it was obvious.

“I thought at first I was out of sync because of the stress but then more months passed…”

“When…”

“four months.” She answered without letting him finish. “I was four months pregnant when I found out and the first thing I did was call you every day. That wasn’t working so I sent the emails.”

He remembered the calls stopping and the emails starting.

“Once a week Will. I emailed once a week and I told you everything in those emails.”

He downed his scotch.

“You were embedded?” He needed to change the subject.

“He stayed with my parents. After six months the guilt and the shame were eating me up inside. I was looking at this tiny version of the love of my life at this sweet little boy…”

“Love of your life?”

“Not important right now Will.” She snapped “And I thought about the conversations we’d had about children and it wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair that I got to be with him and you didn’t even know he existed so I punished myself.”

“You separated yourself from him?” Will couldn’t believe it.

“Never more than a month. A month overseas and then back for a week or two” She answered softly. “It’s the biggest regret of my life. It’s part of the reason I wanted to come back to a newsroom. To be there every day to not miss anymore.”

“You punished yourself.”

“I had to.”

“Fuck. Mac.” He couldn’t believe it.

“What do you want Will?”

“What?” He asked not sure what she was getting at.

“With Ben. What do you want to happen?”

“I uh…” He wanted all of it.

“You’re on the birth certificate.” She told him “He’s your son, you’ve got parental rights.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Benjamin William McHale McAvoy.” She gave the full name.

“McHale-McAvoy, that’s a mouthful…” He thought out loud.

“Actually, it’s just McAvoy. McHale is a middle name.”

“Oh.” He was stunned.

“I told you, I wasn’t keeping you from him. Daddy lives in the TV he knows that. We watch the show together, I record it and we watch it the next day. He deserves to know you Will and you deserve a relationship with him.”

“Can I think about it.” He realised how stupid that sounded as soon as the words left his mouth. He saw the hurt flash across her eyes.

“Ok.” She whispered trying to not sound as upset as she was.

“Fuck. That’s not what I meant.” Will quickly back peddled. “Sorry. It’s been a long day.” She laughed; it was putting it mildly.

“Of course I want to know him.” Will told her quietly “But, and this is important…” he looked at his watch “I’ve been a father for about an hour and I need a bit of time to adjust.”

“Sure.” She agreed, it must have been a shock for him.

“Can we have breakfast on Saturday? All three of us?” He asked

“Yes.” She whispered glad he wasn’t immediately rejecting the idea of her son. Will left not much longer after that, he made sure to get the important information like Ben’s birthday. He stopped once as he left to look at his son sleeping in his bed unaware of what was happening with his parents.

Saturday came around quickly, the week had been busy with the ever-continuing coverage of the BP spill. It was awkward in work, the staff were obviously picking up on some kind of history between them but they worked well together, the show was doing well.

They met at a small deli near to Central Park for cheap coffee and grilled cheese sandwiches, that they ate in the park.

“We could’ve gone somewhere nicer” Will told her sipping on the coffee watching Ben scramble on the Alice and Wonderland statue.

“He’s two Will, nice for him is McDonald’s” She chuckled, appreciating he was trying. “Thank you for paying. Can you hold this?” She handed him the bag with Ben’s half eaten grilled cheese.

“Mummy!!!” Ben ran over. “Hungry.”

“Ask Daddy.” She said, the whole point of the breakfast was to get them to bond but suddenly Ben got shy shook his head and clutched at Mac’s legs.

“It’s ok honey.” Mac tried to pry his hands off her legs but he wasn’t letting go.

“Hey Ben?” Will asked but Ben just shook his head and buried his face in his mother’s legs. Will looked at Mac for a suggestion.

“Shall we go to the zoo?” Mac asked, taking the sandwich back of Will and handing it to Ben who looked ready to cry. He nodded, she looked at Will “Does Daddy want to come?”

Will looked relieved and nodded.

The shyness didn’t improve until they got to the zoo, there was a crowd for penguin feeling. Will crouched down next to Ben who immediately tucked himself closer to Mac “Do you want to see the penguins?” Ben nodded at his father still clutching his mother’s leg and Will held out a hand which Ben took after some deliberation and Will lifted him in the air so he could see over the crowd. After that Ben realised that Will being so tall meant he would be able to see all the animals so when they went to see the grizzly bear Will felt a small tug on his pants leg and when he looked down and saw his son looking up at him

“Daddy?” He’d heard Mac refer to him as Daddy and it felt strange but when he heard it from Ben and he didn’t think he’d ever felt this amazing he just grinned like an idiot “Daddy?” Ben asked again. “Daddy go up?”

It took Will a moment to realise what was being asked “Sure thing.” He scooped Ben up and put him on his shoulders and that’s were he stayed for most of the zoo visit. Before they left they stopped in the gift shop and Will purchased a stuffed penguin giving it to a very happy Ben before scooping him up again, the little boy was tired so tucked himself in to his fathers neck clutching the newly named Pengy the Penguin in one hand.

“Do you want to come over for a coffee?” Mac asked, Will jumped she’d been quiet for a while, he almost forgot she was there.

“Jesus fuck.” He blurted out.

“Will not in front of Ben” She laughed.

“Sorry, it’s just…”

“I didn’t want to interrupt.” She smiled “You were bonding. Coffee? We need to finish talking.”

They got a cab back to Mac’s apartment. “You should put him down, try not to wake him though. He’s terrible without a nap” Mac instructed as Will as they walked in.

After tucking Ben and Pengy into his bed Will joined Mac on the couch.

“Today was…” Will started

“Perfect.” Mac said sadly.

“Mackenzie, I want nothing more than to be part of his life but…”

“I complicate matters.”

“Yeah.” Will leant back on the couch “I can’t just forget and I see you and I get so angry, I’ve got these images in my head…”

Mac looked at him saddly “We’ll work something out.”

“How does it work? With you being a single mom and the show?”

“I’ve got Sophie. She’s an Au Pair from England. I have the mornings and she looks after him once I go to work. There’s a day care at AWM but I didn’t want to subject you to the questions plus it closes at six” Will was grateful that she didn’t expect him to just announce to the world he had a child.

“Ok.”

“Weekends I give Sophie off, she’s off from when I get home Friday to when I go to work on a Monday.”

“How will it work?”

“I thought about this.” Mac cut him off before he could get started. “I want him to still live here with me.”

“I never…”

She held up a hand and cut him off again. “Just until he gets used to you being in his life. I was thinking one day a week, either Saturday or Sunday we just need to agree it advance of the weekend, you have him all day as long as you bring him home for bedtime and then once he’s got that routine we go from there.”

Will nodded, it was a start.

“I don’t expect anything in regards to you and I Will.” He was glad.


	4. Boys Day

** Boys Day **

He walked into her office and she smiled at him, since the weekend and over the course of the week there had been a slight thaw in their relationship. Only slight, he wasn’t really talking about their relationship and it had been painfully obvious for the staff that something had happened between them.

“Big day!” She smiled at him.

“Can I talk to you a second?” He asked, offering no smile in return.

“We’ve got a run-down meeting” Mac reminded him.

“Yeah.” He didn’t care, he shut the door.

She went on rambling about his phone calls, he knew she didn’t actually mind them, although she may have minded the 4am call, Ben had been up most of the night and she hadn’t been asleep long when he called.

“Is that what you want to talk about?” She asked in response to his concerns about the staffers and not leading with the BP spill, they both knew it wasn’t why he was in her office.

“No.” He took a breath “I think most people know you and I were together”

“I do to” She almost laughed it wasn’t exactly a secret

“I don’t want anyone to know why we’re not together, I mean no one..” He didn’t need his personal life to be a subject of gossip for his staff

“Sure.” He looked at her as she gave her answer. “You think I’m going to tell them?” Did he really think she’d want people to know she was a cheater?

“I find it hard to predict what you will and won’t do”

“I won’t be telling anyone.”

“Just so we’re straight”

“We are.”

“I mean it. No one.”

“Just so we’re clear” She was just messing with him now “You want me to tell some people but not everyone.”

“Let’s go” He knew she got it.

“And Ben?” She asked “I’m not going to hide that I have a child.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to.”

“But…” She prompted

“I don’t want a big announcement. If someone asks I’ll tell the truth, I’m not going to hide I’m a father Mac, I’m not embarrassed by our child, I just won’t be making a song and dance about it.”

“Good. I left a gift on your desk.” She told him as she walked past him on the way out of her office.

… … … … … … … … … …

Following her conversation with Sloan and the staff she couldn’t bare the thought that people thought that Will was an ass. “Is Will in his office?” She asked Jim.

“He’s at the thing uptown.”

Fine. If he’s not in she decided to send him an email.

**_Sloan Sabbith is under the impression you cheated on me._ _Let me correct the record and tell her I cheated on you_ _and tore your heart out. You’re a good guy Will and an excellent father. _**

Then she hit send, continued to wax lyrical about how much of a good guy he was and then she heard it. _‘Please god no.’ _She thought as she heard the individual pings of cell phones going off.

“I got a staff email from you.” Jim told her

“No, no, no, no, no” She left the room, smashed Gary’s Blackberry (she’d replace it later).

He walked out of his office whilst she was mid-freak out and he looked furious. The room was silent.

“We stood in my office this morning…”

“Will.” She tried to apologise

“And I said under no circumstances did I want anyone to know what happened and you said yes and yes again…” he took a breath trying not to lose it “… and it seemed, it seemed like you got in and then you sent an email…” she tried to interrupt again “…and you copied 47 reporters on it…” Again she tried to interrupt him “…You know how sometimes something happens that’s so astonishing you just shut down…” She stepped forward “THAT DOESN’T FUCKING HAPPEN TO ME!” He yelled.

“We need some privacy.”

“REALLY?!” 

He lunged towards Martin who’d just announced he’d forwarded the email to corporate and Jim dived in the way. Mac squared up to him ready to take one for the team, she knew he wouldn’t hit her but she’d take the verbal barrage.

“I wish you never told me.” He admitted once they’d finally retreated to the privacy of her office and her heart broke, the unsaid meaning of the words clear to her. If she’d never told him they’d be together, they’d have been a family. Deep down they both knew though, it never would’ve worked, a relationship built on lies.

… … … … … … … …. … …. … … … …

He left the studio after the broadcast and went straight to Charlie to apologise.

“It was my fault.” Mac was right, he really would jump in front of a train for the staff.

“I got an email from Mackenzie.” Charlie told him and Will couldn’t help but laugh.

“I forgot you’d get that.” He laughed again as Charlie told reminded him that the email went to the same people who own a gossip magazine.

“I wish you’d told me.” It was Charlie’s way of apologising for bringing her here. “You’ve got a child?”

“Yeah.” Will pulled his phone out and showed him the photo he’d snapped of Ben snuggling with Pengy on the sofa, Mac had sent it to him. He hadn’t put the Penguin down since Will gave it to him.

“Cute. Spitting image of you.” Charlie remarked.

“Ben” Was all Will could manage to say “His, uh, name is Ben. He’s 2 and a half, nearly”

“Best feeling in the world right?” He didn’t need to say what the feeling was.

“Yeah.” Will grinned. “It’s my fault.” Will added

“The broadcast?”

“No, well yes, that I haven’t seen him for two years. She told me, hundreds of times she told me. I never read the emails, never listened to the voicemails…”

“I know Kiddo.” Charlie offered an apologetic smile. “Get it together down there.” Back on business.

… … … … … … … … …

“Are you in or are you out?” Mac yelled to him as he went back to his office.

“What?”

“Are you in or are you out?” She asked again before lecturing him on Palin. “Be the leader Will.”

“Today’s Friday.” She told him “By Monday I want to know are you in or are you out?”

“See you on Sunday.” She added as she stormed away.

He went into his office and finally looked at the small box Mackenzie had put in there earlier; he opened the wrapping and it was a framed photo from the zoo. Ben on his shoulders, Will pointing at the exhibit and both with massive smiles on their faces. He placed it in the corner of his desk.

… … … … … … … … …

“You can go up Mr McAvoy” Mac’s doorman told him and he got in the elevator and went up the stairs, they hadn’t talked since Friday night when he told her that he was in. He knocked on the door.

“Hi.” She smiled at him.

“Hi.” He put his hands in his pockets, this was awkward and they both knew it. “Is…”

“He’s finishing his breakfast; would you like some coffee?” She stepped aside to let him in.

“Sure.”

She handed him a warm mug and he watched as Ben and Pengy sat in front of the TV watching Sesame Street.

“Benny are you nearly done with breakfast?” Mac asked him and he turned around and saw his mother and father.

“Hi buddy.” Will said and Ben clutched the stuffed penguin tighter before mumbling a quiet hello back.

“You’re still pretty new to him Will.” Mac touched his arm knowing that Will would be disappointed that his son was still scared of him, he’d thought they’d had a break-though.

“Hey, you and I are going to have a good day today” Will told him and the little boy looked at his mother.

“You and Daddy are going to hang-out all day today.” Mac said cheerfully hoping her nerves didn’t rub off on her son.

“Ok.” Ben said quietly.

Mac and Will left him to finish his cereal.

“It’ll get better, he just needs a chance to know you’re not scary. I actually had an idea, I wanted to run by you.”

He cocked an eyebrow at her, his way of telling her to go on.

“So now that everyone knows, I’ve reassessed that to 95% my fault by the way, I was thinking about maybe booking him at the day care in the building.”

“Mac…”

“It gives Sophie a bit more of a life and we can see him whenever, you can spend some more time with him…”

“It’s a good idea.”

She wasn’t listening to him “…If you wanted to take him to lunch, and Billy if you are it better be healthy, I don’t want him eating junk food all the time, speaking of which you…”

“Mac.” He grabbed her shoulders. “First of all, I don’t eat junk, it’s just I’m built to eat like a real boy that’s all, it’s a Midwest thing we eat red meat. Second, I said it’s a good idea. I’m in.”

“Oh.” She was surprised. “I thought you’d need more convincing.”

“You had another Quixotic speech planned?”

“Kind of, yeah.”

“Never mind.”

“Mummy done.” Ben appeared in the kitchen.

“Shall we get dressed?” Mac asked him picking him up and carrying him to the bedroom, leaving Will to his thoughts.

“Good morning Mr McAvoy.” A chirpy voice greeted him as a young woman walked into the kitchen and headed straight to the coffee machine, Will vaguely recognised her from the other night.

“You’re Sophie, right?” Will held out his hand to shake which she took “You can call me Will.”

“Nice to meet you finally Will. I heard a lot about you.”

“Oh god.”

“Only good things. I heard a lot about the zoo from Ben this week.” She laughed and Will smiled.

Mac came back into the kitchen, “Is this OK Will?” She nodded her head towards Ben who was dressed casually. “I just need to grab him a jumper” Mac asked

“I got him one.” Will remembered picking up a bag he’d brought with him.

“Oh.” Mac gave Ben a small nudge on the back “Go see what Daddy brought you.”

Ben nervously stepped forward and Will pulled out a New York Yankees hoodie, which he placed on his knee before pulling out a Yankees cap and placed it on Ben’s head and then handed him a small child size baseball glove which he handed to Ben. “I thought we’d go to a ball game this afternoon.” Will shrugged. Mac smiled it was a sweet gesture, she thought Will was brave taking a toddler to a four hour long baseball game but he was trying, she’d let him learn this one on his own.

“Thank you.” Ben interrupted and Will looked down and smiled.

“What time is bed time? Will asked

“Around 7:30pm” Mac was beginning to get nervous, sure she’d dreamed of Will and Ben spending time together and bonding but this was the first time she was sending her son off into the wild of New York City with a man who’d been a father for just over two weeks. They were both equally afraid of each other she thought with a smile.

“Mac!” Will’s voice broke her out of her thought pattern. “We’re off, we’ll see you later ok?” He smiled trying to let her know it would be ok.

… … … … … … … … … …

Later they were sat in the corner of a busy McDonald’s Will still smiling about the conversation he’d had downstairs with his son

_“Ok Benny what do you want?” He crouched down so he was at eye level, his knees probably wouldn’t forgive him, but he’d read it was a good way to bond. _

_There was some pondering, the little face scrunched up in concentration, ‘perhaps I’ve made a mistake’ Will thought. “Cheeseburger and nuggs.” Ben said confidently. _

_Will chuckled “Pick one.”_

_His tiny double scowled ‘That’s a look he learnt from his mother’ Will thought. “Nuggs and Cheeseburger.” He said and Will had to fight to keep in the laughter. _

_“How about we have nuggets later and just get the cheeseburger for now?” Will asked him. _

_“OK daddy.” He smiled. Will wasn’t sure he’d won that debate. _

He was now sat watching as his son dismantled the burger, pulling the bread off and placing it on the burger wrapping before picking up the patty and eating it. Again trying not to laugh, he’d have to ask Mac about it later.

Picking up a fry he was about to put it in his mouth when he was stopped by a stern voice going “No Daddy.” Will looked at his son. “You need ket-up.” Ben told him in a matter of fact manner, it took Will a second to realise they were talking about ketchup. “Fries need ket-up.” Will grabbed one of the packets that had been given to them by the staff and poured it inside the box his own burger had come in so that he could dip is fries, Ben seemed satisfied by this.

… … … … … … … … … …

Will smiled from his seat in box behind Homeplate, Ben was stood on his tiptoes barely able to see over the wall, staring open mouthed at the game in front of him. A-Rod struck out and the inning ended and Ben walked back over to him. “Having fun buddy?” Will asked as he picked his son up and put him on his lap, Ben nodded and yawned, Will wrapped an arm around him as the game started again. By the 7th Inning stretch Ben was curled up fast asleep in his lap.

… … … … … … … … … …

Will carefully pulled his son out of the car, he stirred and sleepy blue eyes looked up.

“Daddy?”

“Nearly home Benny.”

“Ok.” He snuggled into his father’s chest and Will walked through the doors of the building asking the doorman to call up to Mac’s apartment to let her know they were home.

“Hey!” Mac greeted them at the door.

“Hi Mummy” Ben yawned.

“Hey Mac.”

“He looks worn out, what did you do to him?” She took him from Will’s arms.

“Boys day, that’s a secret.”

“Did you guys have food?” Mac asked

“Yes, he’s been fed and walked.” Will rolled his eyes.

“Will, I’m being serious.”

“Yes, we’ve eaten.”

“What did you feed him?”

“That’s a secret.”

“Benny? What did you and daddy eat?”

“Burgers and, and…” He thought for a second “Hot dogs.”

“WILL!” Mac stared at him “I thought we discussed.”

“Boys day Mac! They don’t exactly sell fruit and veg at a ballpark.”

Ben gave a big yawn “Mummy I’m sleepy”

“Ok honey, let’s find Pengy and then bedtime ok.” He nodded “say good-bye to Daddy.”

“Bye Daddy. Love you.” Will thought his heart was going to explode.


	5. Vomit

** Vomit **

It was Tuesday and Will was excited as he walked out of the first run-down meeting of the day. Not only was this weekend his first ever Father’s Day (or rather, the first he was aware that he was a father) it was also going to be Ben’s first full weekend staying over. It was all arranged, once she picked him up from Day Care Sophie would be taking Ben to Will’s place to wait for him to come home from work.

“Hey.” Mac stuck her head in his office.

“Hey” He smiled at her.

“You’re in a good mood.” Mac leant against the doorframe.

“Just thinking about this weekend.” He told her.

“Big plans?” She asked walking in

“Oh yeah.” He gestured to the couch in the corner, it was a new addition, he was trying to be more approachable. He thought maybe people might come and speak to him more if he didn’t make them stand or sit in front of him like naughty school children. “Boys weekend it’s all sports, beer and strippers.”

“What every two year old wants.”

“Absolutely. Who needs naps, milk and Sesame Street?” He asked her “Everything is in place for this weekend, just so you can stop freaking out about it.”

“Who says I’m freaking out?” He cocked an eyebrow to tell her he knew she was lying.

“His bedroom is finished…”

“I hope you haven’t spoilt him with toys and things”

“…We’ve got our ballpark tickets for Sunday, Saturday we’re going to the bubble thing…”

“Gazillion Bubbles?” Mac interrupted

“Yeah”

“I always wanted to see that”

“Join us if you want.”

“Are you sure? I won’t be ruining boys weekend?”

“Nah.” He made a mental note to purchase the extra ticket “I uh, added you Sophie and Ben to the visitor list at my building by the way.”

“What?”

“You’re on the list, of people who can come up without checking.”

“Thanks.” She stood “I actually came in here to tell you I’ll be out most of tomorrow morning and probably some of the afternoon.”

“Going anywhere nice?”

“Oh super exciting.”

“There’s a meeting I can’t say any more than that at the moment”

“Might need me for a red team?” He asked, lighting a cigarette. He’d been trying to quit but it wasn’t working so he just settled for not trying not to smoke around Mac, which also wasn’t working so he was putting 110% of his effort in to not smoking anywhere near Ben.

“I’ll let you know if anything comes of it.” She moved to the door “I will say though, they’re a bit paranoid so I’ll have to have my phone off, I won’t be reachable.”

… … … … … … … … … …

“News Night you’re through to Maggie Jordan. How can I help?” Maggie picked up her desk phone “No neither of them are in at the moment…” Maggie was used to people still calling her desk looking for Will as he hadn’t gotten around to hiring a new assistant yet. “…Will’s in meeting with Charlie Skinner you could try calling his office…” She looked at the clock and that’s when she saw Will approaching the door of the newsroom “…actually he’s back now. I’ll tell him.”

She quickly walked to intercept him “Will, Day Care downstairs called, they’re trying to reach you or Mac apparently Ben isn’t feeling well, like throw up all over the floor not feeling well and they want someone to go…” She hadn’t finished her sentence before Will had turned and walked back out the door he just came in through.

… … … … … … … … … …

He got off the elevator and walked into the day care room and saw Ben curled up on a chair wrapped around Pengy.

“Mr McAvoy!” One of the staff beckoned him over. “Benjamin is ok, he was feeling a little run down this morning when he got here, he only had a mild fever well below the limit that we ask parents to keep the children away. He’s got a little worse over the last hour or so and then he threw up.”

Will crouched next to the chair and stroked his son’s head he could feel the heat coming off him. “Hey Benny” He whispered softly to get the little one’s attention.

“Daddy, tummy hurting” He mumbled before squeezing his toy penguin tighter

“I didn’t think they were allowed to bring toys from home?” Will asked as he picked up Ben.

“Ms McHale said he just wouldn’t let go this morning; he’s been in the nap corner cuddling it most of the morning”

“Thanks for calling”

“Mr McAvoy, we need Ben to be symptom free for 48hrs before we can let him back in the day care.” Will nodded as he walked out.

… … … … … … … … … …

Ever since the infamous email it hadn’t exactly been a secret that Will and Mac had a son, although he hadn’t yet appeared in the newsroom. So, the sight of Will carrying the small toddler through the newsroom had most of the staff craning their heads.

Will carried him straight into his office and put him on the couch. He took his sweater off and made a blanket for him and dimmed the lights, leaving only a small desk lamp on as he tried and failed to work.

“Will?” The door was knocked quietly, and Jim stuck his head in “We’ve got the 10 o’clock run-down meeting”

“You run it, you know what Mac would do and just let me know.”

“Sure thing.”

Will sent a quick text to Mac telling her to come straight to his office whenever she got out of her meeting.

A little while later Sloan popped into his office “Hey.” She said, “Sorry to bother you.” She took in the sight of Will sat on his couch having given up on anything resembling work, and was just slowly stroking Ben's hair, the little boy was using his legs as a pillow, the trash can being used as a makeshift sick bowl.

“It’s ok.” He told her “How can I help?”

“One of the interns gave me this.” She handed the package to Will, it was the medicine he’d asked one of the interns to go out and get him. “And also, here’s my copy for my segment later. If you want to read it and prep for later.”

“Thanks” He said taking the paper with the hand not being used to gently stroke his son’s hair.

The next person who walked into his office was Mackenzie.

“Is he ok?” She asked in lieu of greeting. “I got the voice message from Day Care.”

“He’s thrown up a few more times” He indicated to the medicine at his feet “He’s had some of this”

Mac crouched down in front of him and felt his forehead “He’s warm. I’m going to take the rest of the day off and take him home. Can I trust you to behave and not fuck with Jim too much?”

Will stood and picked up Ben who was fast asleep at this point. “I’ll call a car to take you guys home.” He handed the sleeping toddler to Mac.

When the car arrived, he walked them out of the newsroom, a hand on the small of Mackenzie’s back. For the first time the staff got a glimpse in to the private world of Will and Mac and despite all the bickering, they thought maybe there was still some feeling there.

“Congratulations Will” Mac said as he got in the car.

“What do you mean?”

“You got puked on by your child for the first time.” She pointed at his pants leg which was covered in vomit.

He chuckled “Does this officially make me a parent now?”

She smiled and closed the door.

… … … … … … … … … …

Ben didn’t improve for the rest of the week “Just a stomach bug” Mac had reassured him on the telephone after taking him to the paediatrician. 

His phone rang a little after 7pm on the Friday night “Sorry, I know you’re probably getting ready for the show but I just called to let you know that I think we’re going to have to postpone boys weekend” Mac told him.

“Still not feeling great?” He asked, he didn’t need to say who he was talking about.

“Not really, although the diarrhoea has stopped so at least we’re only firing from the one end now and that’s with much less frequency.”

“That’s good to hear. Hopefully he’ll be better and you can come back soon?” Will asked

“Miss me Will?” She teased

“Not you but I think I’m about to send Scooter into early retirement.”

Mac just laughed “Have a good show. Be nice to Jim, I need him.”

… … … … … … … … … …

Mac wasn’t expecting the knock on the door Sunday morning and she was even more surprised to see Will there. “We definitely had a conversation…”

“I know, but I just wanted to pop over and see him. I missed our Friday lunch…”

Friday’s were a little tradition, Will and Ben would have lunch in the executive dining room on a Friday afternoon and sometimes Mac joined them but more often than not it was just the two of them.

“…Plus I was looking forward to us all spending the day together.”

“Will…”

“I know. It’s Father’s Day” He shrugged.

“Come in.” She stepped aside and let him in. He looked at her she looked nothing like the Mackenzie he saw at work. This Mac was in sweats and a much too large US Marines T-Shirt, her hair looked like it hadn’t been washed all week and she had bags under her eyes.

“Have you slept?” He asked her and she laughed.

“I have a sick toddler Will and a show to run”

“Jim’s being doing that…”

“I’ve been working from home Will, keeping my fingers in the proverbial pie.” She yawned.

“Mummy, I sicked again.” Ben shouted from the living room, clearly upset. Mac went to go to him.

“Get some sleep Mac. I’ve got this.” She looked him the eye and could see it was true so she nodded and Will went to the child, she heard the little boys excited cry when he realised his dad was there.

She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow and was shocked that when she looked at the clock it was nearly 1pm. Her first thought was pure panic, who was looking after Ben? Then she remembered that Will had arrived shortly before 9am, as far as she could tell nothing had gone wrong, running a hand through her Mac shuddered, she’d been having quick five minute showers here and there whenever Ben fell asleep and she was able to find a moment to rinse off whichever bodily fluid he’d left on her this time.

Mac left the boiling hot shower feeling refreshed, she put on what she called regular human clothes and sought out her child and her…she wasn’t sure what he was. She found them largely where she’d left them, Ben on the couch, Will sat on the floor with a guitar she hadn’t even noticed he’d brought with him singing some nonsense song that he’d just made up Ben was laughing and Will looked happier than she’d ever seen him, although he’d probably regret sitting on the floor.

“I have perfectly good furniture Will…” She said alerting him to her presence.

“This is an intimate concert Mac, I’ve got to get close to my audience.” He kept strumming the guitar strings.

“Says the TV anchor.” She challenged

“I only anchor on the side.” He winked at her and carried on the song he was singing.

She went into the kitchen and made two cups of coffee and was surprised to see a plate of food wrapped with a post-it _‘Eat Me Mac’ _in Will’s untidy scrawl. The sandwich looked good, much like showering, food was a what can be grabbed quickly and easily. She went back in to living room and handed the extra cup to Will who was trying (and almost definitely going to fail) to resist Ben’s demands of “Again Daddy!” looking for an encore.

“How about we let Daddy have a break?” Mac suggested and Ben turned giving her a steely glare he’d inherited from Will that let her know that it was not an option. “Why don’t you give Daddy his presents?” She prompted, he seemed to like that idea and he climbed down from the couch and looked at his mother “Ok, we’ll go get them.” She smiled at Will and took Ben’s hand, disappearing down the hallway before coming back five minutes later with a gift bag.

Ben handed the bag to Will who thanked him. He looked in the bag, the first thing he pulled out was a piece of paper with some shapes on it that were clearly supposed to be people and a blob that he thought may be a certain stuffed penguin.

“It’s us Daddy.” Ben smiled at him. He pointed at the biggest shape “You.” Then a much smaller shape “Mummy.” Then the much smaller shape “Me.” Finally indicating to the blob “Pengy.”

“I love it.” Will told him sincerely.

Ben smiled and pulled another wrapped package out of the bag and handed it to Will, who dutifully unwrapped the obligatory ‘World’s Best Dad’ mug. Will smiled, hugged Ben close and mouthed “Thanks” at Mac before he suddenly closed his eyes as he felt something warm and wet on his back.

“Sorry Daddy”

“It’s ok buddy” Will picked Ben up and put him back on the couch, grabbed the cloth and wiped his face before pulling the sweater he’d been wearing off.

“Give it here.” Mac told him and Will handed his now puke covered sweater to Mac.

… … … … … … … … …

Ben was finally in bed and Will leaned back on Mac’s couch.

“Here.” She handed him the wine glass and sat next to him.

“I’m sorry you did this on your own for 2 and half years.” Will has exhausted.

“It’s ok Billy.” It’s the first time he’s heard her call him Billy since she left.

“I should’ve been here Mac.”

“You didn’t know.”

“I should’ve.”

“I told you…”

“…that’s not what I, fuck, Mac that’s not what I’m getting at.” He rubbed his face. “I know you told me, but there’s a reason I didn’t read the fucking emails.”

“I know that Will.” She swallowed a large mouthful of wine. “What’s happening here?”

“I don’t know.”

“What do you want?” She asked nervously.

“I don’t…” He started she put a hand on his thigh.

“Don’t lie to me. You’re a smart guy. What do you want?” She pushed

“I can’t get the image out of my head.” He admitted.

“What image?”

“You. Him.” Two words that crushed her soul nearly as much as him pushing her hand away.

“I should go.” He finished his drink. “I can’t do this Mac.”

Will walked out of the apartment, she finished her drink ‘_back to square one’ _she thought as she went to pour another glass, it was only the small cry of "Mummy!" That stopped her. 


	6. The Apology

** The Apology **

Things were awkward since he’d walked out of her apartment three days ago. There had been something familiar in the relationship they’d had since the evening he first found out he’d had a child. He thought he was going for some kind of amicable relationship for the sake of Ben but obviously she’d thought it was something more and he couldn’t have that.

“Hey, can we talk?” He knocked on her door after the show, coffee mug in hand, something in the back of his mind told him this is exactly the kind of mixed signal that has caused the current predicament.

“Will…”

He held up a hand and cut her off before placing the coffee mug on her desk. “Look Mac, I think I owe you an apology.” Her eyes widened and she cocked her head “I think I let you think that maybe, I don’t know, maybe us, we, that maybe we are going somewhere.” She was silent. “When you told me about Bri…” he couldn’t say the name “When you told me.” He didn’t need to specify, she was a smart cookie and she’d figure it out. “When you told me and I said we’re done, I meant that.” The hurt in her eyes made something prickle in the back of his heart which he quickly forced back down “I think it’s important for Ben and for the show that we’re amicable…”

“Amicable…” She laughed

“Yeah amicable. But, I don’t want you thinking this is something more Mackenzie and I’m sorry if that wasn’t clear.”

“Ok.” She told him whilst holding in her emotion, truth be told he had been sending mixed signals but she knew she shouldn’t assume, the man paid £3 million dollars to fire her on a weekly basis. It wasn’t exactly the stuff relationships were built on. She watched sadly as he nodded and walked out of her office.

… … … … … … …. …

He was sat in his kitchen scotch in a glass, cigarette in one hand dwelling over the conversation he’d had with Mac. It wasn’t his best apology but then he wasn’t entirely sure she needed one. She’d hurt him, she’d left and now they were in this weird limbo where she was trying to make him and everything else better. That was when inspiration struck, he grabbed a pad of paper and his pen and he started writing.

He regretted faxing it to her as soon as the machine announced it was done, waking her up at 2am with a fax of a far better apology than the one he gave her for his viewers wasn’t smart but he wasn’t surprised when the phone rang 10 minutes later.

_“Have you shown this to anyone else?” _She didn’t even let him say hello

“Jim, I forwarded it to Jim after I sent it to you.”

_“It’s good Billy, could use some work but it’s good. Call Jim, if he’s awake and he’s read it he won’t be sleeping. I’ll see you in the Newsroom as soon as you get there.”_

“You’re still in work?”

_“No, you sent it to me at home, but I’m just about to give Sophie a nudge and tell her I’m on the way out.” _

Working with her on the on-air apology had been good for both of them, they’d been able to establish some professional boundaries however, their personal life was still strained. Sure, they were polite in front of Ben and got on together for him, but it wasn’t the same it had been before he got sick.

… … … … … …

“The media elite Bill really?” His sister laughed down the phone, she’d called after the broadcast.

“What can I say?” Will laughed back

“You know he hated it.” Catherine told him.

“When does he not hate what I say on the TV?” Will asked. He didn’t care what his father thought of the show or his apology.

“He made some asinine comment about it being why you’re single and childless.” Will knew what was coming next “You’ve not told him yet?” Catherine asked

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Are you seriously asking me why I’m not telling him that he’s a Grandfather?” Will loved his sister and he missed her, but he couldn’t understand why she wanted him to have more of a relationship with their father than he did. Three phone calls a year is the only relationship he had with his dad. A call on Christmas and a call on their birthdays.

“He’s already a Grandfather.” She pointed out. “I’ve got three kids, Susan has two and Dan can’t stop having them, he’s up to 4 and if you ask me I think Mel’s pregnant again…”

“So he’s already got 9 and a half, he doesn’t need one more.” Will was digging his heels in.

“Please Billy Bear?” She threw out her childhood nick name for him, it was emotional blackmail normally he couldn’t resist.

“I don’t want him having any relationship with my son.” Will put his foot down.

“I understand that, I really do and he doesn’t have to but you should at least let him know he exists.” Cath pleaded.

“I’ll think about it.” Will relented, he never could deny his sisters anything.

“I’ll make sure you do.” She said menacingly.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He was worried.

“Tommy is applying for colleges. He’s looking at both Princeton and Columbia which to me seems like a perfect opportunity to visit my big brother and maybe meet that nephew of mine?”

“There’s no way Tommy is old enough to be applying for college.”

“You’re telling me!” He sister laughed “Won’t be long before Ben’s in college either.”

… … … … … …

Mackenzie was nervous, she knew that the McAvoy siblings were close and that Will had explained exactly why they’d broken up she wasn’t sure how Cath would react to seeing her and their child.

“Mummy!” A happy voice called to her from across the bullpen and she looked up to see Ben and Will walking across the bullpen with his sister and nephew in tow.

“Hi, did you have a good lunch with Daddy?” She said as she took the child from Will.

“Yeah.” He wrapped his arms around her.

“Did you have fun with Auntie Cath and Tommy?”

“Yeah.” He mumbled quietly.

“Good.” She looked at Will who nodded to her unanswered question, Ben was still a little shy around new people.

“They’re from Ne-nebaska” He told her quietly

“Really?!” Mac was good at feigning surprise and Ben nodded excitedly.

“We’re gonna to the ah… kwer… ah kewr” He scrunched his face up “Daddy?”

“Aquarium” Will said slowly.

“Yeah! With the fishies. Are you coming Mummy?” He asked big blue eyes looking up at her.

“No honey, not this time.”

“Mommy doesn’t like jellyfish…” Will explained

“Which is perfectly reasonable.” Mac mumbled

“We don’t want Mommy to be afraid do we?” Will asked and Ben shook his head although he was clearly disappointed.

Cath looked at Will clearly understanding the weak excuse and Will looked away not willing to get into that with his sister.

“Benny I think it’s time to go back downstairs it’s nearly naptime.” Ben grumbled and Will laughed as Mac handed him Ben to take back to day care.

Will left the room and she was awkwardly left with Cath and Tommy.

“It’s nice to see you again Cath.”

“Hmmm….”

“How have you been?”

“Mackenzie…”

“I tried to tell him.”

“I know. Listen Mackenzie the thing with Will is he doesn’t always listen to his head.” Cath’s answer surprised Mac, out of all Will’s siblings Cath was the closest to Will they were only a year apart and Catherine continued “What happened between you then, I don’t hold it against you and I don’t hold Ben against you either. I love my brother but he’s a pig-headed moron”

“I hurt him” Mac said quietly

“Yeah and he hurt you back.” Cath said quietly and the two fell into an easy kind of peace.


	7. It's a Date

He watched the smoke from his cigarette float up into the night sky and dwelled on the conversation he’d had with his sister over brunch before she went to the airport:

_“He’s adorable.” Cath smiled as she watched Tommy show a wide-eyed Ben a game on his cell phone. _

_“Yeah he’s pretty great” Will smiled at his sister and his son. _

_“I gotta be honest I never thought you’d ever actually have a child” She looked him in the eye. _

_“Neither did I.” Will answered honestly “I didn’t think after everything...” He looked up “I didn’t want kids before her.” He looked his sister in the eye “After we broke up, I kind of wrote the whole thing off you know? Marriage, kids…all of it.”_

_“She’s back.” _

_“Doesn’t change what happened.” _

_“People make mistakes. It’s ok to forgive people when they hurt us.” Cath told him softly. “There’s two versions of William McAvoy. Billy McAvoy, the boy I remember growing up who was too sad and too smart for his good but he met this little English girl who made him happy…”_

_“Where are you going with this Cathy?” He interrupted not liking where the conversation was going._

_“…Then there’s Will McAvoy who was this sad guy who doesn’t want everyone knowing he’s the smartest guy in the room and is so damn afraid of offending anyone that he reports on kittens, weather and showbiz.” _

_“Seriously…”_

_“Bill shut up. What I’m trying to say is she makes you happy.” _

_“She hurt me.”_

_“So, forgive her.”_

_“So she can hurt me again?” He snapped_

_“Just because the last person you tried to forgive…”_

_“This is not about him.” Will hissed_

_“If you say so.” Cath reached across and grabbed her brother’s hand. “There’s a story I heard at church the other day, can I tell you?” _

_Will sighed. “Go ahead.” _

_“There was little boy who kept shredding paper. His parents couldn’t get him to stop and kept taking him to all these doctors which makes him miserable. Finally, after spending thousands on doctors his parents take him to the most expensive doctor they can find. This doctor looks at the kid and he says kid, if you stop shredding paper you’re parents will stop taking you to doctors. This kid looks at his parents and says why didn’t you just say so?” Cath looks at Will expectantly. _

_“Is there a point to that or?...”_

_“It was something about letting Jesus and the Lord into your life but, the point was this kid was doing something that made him miserable because he thought it would make him happy…” _

_“Cath I think I get where you’re going…” _

_“All you have to do to be happy Billy Bear is stop hurting yourself.” _

_“And let Jesus in?” _

_“Or Mackenzie.” _

** _End Flashback_ **

Will took another drag of his cigarette, his sister just didn’t get it. He wasn’t miserable he had Ben, he had one of the most watched programmes on cable news and he had Erin Andrews phone number. He had it pretty good. Will glanced at his watch it was nearly 2am, he should probably get some sleep, Mac would have his ass on a plate if she had anymore complaints from hair and make-up about having to keep hiding the bags under eyes.

He walked into the kitchen and placed his empty scotch glass on the counter and was just about to go to bed when he heard the tell-tale sign of his fax machine printing something out. He walked over.

“Huh” He was confused, someone had sent him polling data from the Republican primary Senate race in Utah.

… … … … … … **...**

Mackenzie was talking to his date. This was not good. A date that Will had arranged to prove to his sister (read: himself) that he didn’t need Mac to make him happy. It also had the added advantage of reiterating to Mac that he was over her, Cath had told him about the conversation she’d had with Mackenzie and he didn’t need Mac thinking she had a chance. He did not forgive.

He hurried over to where Mac was talking to Danielle. “This is Mackenzie McHale, my secretary.” He said after he heard her call him old, two could play at that game.

“Multiple Peabody Award winning Executive Producer.” She looked him dead in the eye and he dragged her off to his office.

“Can I warn you about something?” She asked and then without giving him an answer “You’re a rich and famous person and for that reason only she may want to sleep with you…”

“That didn’t sound like something that should come with a warning, that sounded like something that should come with balloons.”

“I loathe you right now.” She snapped at him.

“You have ink on your face.”

“I work with Pens!” She yelled at him.

“Get a grip.” He told her.

… … … … … … …

First there was Danielle, then Darshana, Sophie, Nicole and then he kind of stopped remembering their names. He could tell the women were bothering Mac, things had been slightly strained when he’d dropped Ben off after their weekends and at first it bothered him but, then why should it bother him? They were over, he could move on, he was allowed to do that. Fuck it. Mac just had to get over it.

… … … … … …

“And I want to say something to you that’s both inappropriate and insubordinate.” Maggie added as she gave him information on one of the candidates concession speeches.

“What was that last one?”

“I want to say something to you that's inappropriate, insubordinate, and grounds for termination.” Maggie stated again before she took a breath and continued “You could give Mac a break and have the women meet you at the restaurant.” 

“That was inappropriate and insubordinate.” Will turned and looked her in the eye “But I don’t care…” 

“Thank you.” 

“…You should know your head is up your ass.”

“Will I know…” 

“You don’t know anything, Maggie. I’ve got that image of Mac with her ex-boy… It won’t come out.” This conversation was eerily like the one he’d had with Mac a few months ago. “Look, I’m not doing it on purpose. I’m not rubbing her face in anything. I’m simply not considering her feelings at all.” He paused. Shit. “Yeah I just heard myself say that.” 

It wasn’t just about him and Mac and yeah, he still felt if Mac didn’t want to see him date other women then she shouldn’t have cheated on him. However, if he hurt his relationship with her anymore then his goals of maintaining an amicable relationship for Ben’s sake would be lost. So, during the next break he went into the control room to apologise to Mac.

  
… … … … … … 

“This is my friend Wade Campbell.” He just stared at her as she said it not really hearing what ever Wade was saying to him.

“We’ve been dating for about three months.” He watched as she took a breath “I’m sorry.” 

“No, this is exactly what’s supposed to happen.” He hoped it sounded convincing. 

She’s dating. Fuck. He wasn't expecting it to hurt. 

**TBC… **   
  



	8. Party

It was Monday, nearly lunchtime and in her office, Mac stared at the document in front of her, they’d just had one of their biggest fights in a long time. It wasn’t exactly unusual, things since he’d found out about Wade had been…difficult.

** _Flashback_ **

_“Can I talk to you for a minute?” She hoovered in his doorway. “I need to talk to you about Ben’s…”_

_“Is everything ok? Is he ok?” Will fired at her. _

_She laughed “…Birthday party.” She fidgeted in the doorway, trapping her bottom lip between her teeth. She was nervous about the conversation. _

_“We’re having a party?” Will asked_

_“Yeah, it’s kind of what you do. Some of the kids from day care at the Y on 92nd Street, they’ve got a pretty cool jungle gym which is perfect for…never mind, I wanted to ask if…”_

_“Of course, I’m coming.” _

_“…Not what I was asking. I wanted to ask if you were ok with Wade coming.” It came out quickly, he wasn’t sure if he’d heard her. _

_“Wade.” He stated._

_“Yeah.”_

_“Why?”_

_“He’s my boyfriend.” She said with faux confidence._

_“You want him to come to our son’s birthday party?”_

_“Will…”_

_“He’s met Ben?”_

_“Yeah…”_

_“You didn’t think I’d want to know?” _

_“That he’d met Ben?”_

_“Yeah, I think if you’re going to be introducing men to our son…”_

_“Man. Not men. Just the one. The one I’m in a relationship with, the one who…”_

_“Stop calling him the one.” He snapped unsure where that came from._

_“What are you?...”_

_Luckily Jim walked in (or unlucky if you were Jim who’d lost the game of rock, paper, scissors to see who had to go interrupt their latest fight) and told them that everyone was ready for the rundown meeting. _

_… …. …. …. …. … …_

_“Something you want to say Will?” Mac snapped as he snarked at her for what felt like the hundredth time during the meeting.” The staff sunk in their seats. They’d been fighting a lot since Mac had brought her boyfriend to the studio during the election coverage. _

_“No, just that I don’t think that this wiki leak crap should be our top story.” _

_“Well what should it be? How about…” _

_The staff pretended not to listen to their fight, but it became impossible when it took a dramatically more personal turn as Mac stormed over to where Tess was sat and grabbed the magazine she had under her file. _

_“What about this one Will?” She flung the magazine down, it had Will on the front of it with some socialite. _

_“I’m allowed to date Mackenzie!” _

_“But I’m not allowed to introduce one man to our son?” She snapped “What happens when he’s old enough to google you Will? Am I supposed to feel bad for introducing a friend to him, but you’re allowed to parade a bunch of blonde bimbos across the tabloids? How are you going to explain that one or two or three to him?”_

_“HEY!” Jim yelled to grab their attention, it worked. They suddenly remembered where they were._

** _End Flashback._ **

“Hey.” He leant against her office door.

“If you’re here to yell at me about the run down…” She started but Will cut her off.

“I’m here to ask you to lunch.”

The turn around in his attitude was so fast she legitimately thought she had whiplash.

“Are you kidding me right now?”

“I think we need to have an adult conversation about the party and Wade.” He shuffled into the room. “Plus, I could use a drink, I don’t know about you.”

“Jesus Christ Billy.” She put her head in her hands. How could he go from yelling at her one minute to asking her for lunch the next?

“What now?” He grumped

“I can’t deal with this. One minute you’re yelling at me in front of everyone and the next you’re asking me out to lunch like nothing happened.”

“I’m trying.” He mumbled

“I just need some time to cool off.” She offered a weak smile. “Maybe not today Will.”

He stomped out of her office and for the rest of the week everyone had to deal with the frosty atmosphere between them.

… … … … … …

Mac stood drinking her coffee uncomfortably in her kitchen, Will was going to arrive at some point to collect Ben and they’d barely said three words to each other outside of the studio since she turned him down for lunch. The knock at the door came and Mac jumped and went and let Will in.

She looked at him stood in her doorway and chewed her bottom lip “Hi Will.”

“Mac.”

“He’s just finishing his breakfast and watching…” She leaned back and listened “Clifford the Big Red Dog I think”

“I can wait, I don’t…”

“Will, you wanted to talk. Come in have a coffee.” She smiled nervously at him and he nodded.

He poked his head into Mac’s living room “Hey Benny.”

“Hi Daddy.” Ben didn’t even turn around from his spot on the couch and Will followed Mac into the kitchen.

“Mac…”

“Listen Will…” They both started speaking at the same time.

“Will.” Mac grabbed a mug from the cabinet. “You’re not being fair. You can’t throw all your dates in my face, tell me we have no chance and then get mad at me because I’ve finally decided to try and move on with my life.”

“I know. I just, I don’t know. It surprised me is all.” Will offered a small smile as a thanks as she passed him the mug. “If you’re ready to move on then I’m ok with it. He wasn’t, but he wasn’t willing to address those feelings now.

“Thank you.” Mac wanted to admit she didn’t want to move on but voicing that opinion was a sure-fire way of crushing the delicate peace they’d seemed to be forging that morning.

“You’re going to need to get going if you’re going to make his appointment.” Mac said glancing at the clock in front of her.

“Where am I going?” Will asked, a few weeks ago he’d agreed to take Ben to a dentist appointment, there was an early meeting with all the EP’s that Mac needed to attend.

“It’s on 5th near the park.”

As Will and Ben left, Mac again asked Will about the party which was being held a week Saturday, Will told her was looking forward to it. He wasn’t but she didn’t need to know that.

… … … … … …

Will clutched the gift bag in his hand tighter than expected, he was excited to spend his son’s birthday with him but wasn’t looking forward to spending the day with Mackenzie _and _her new boyfriend. He took a deep breath and walked in-to the party, Mac smiled as she saw him and walked over, glancing at the large bag in his hand.

“Relax Mac.” Will told her forcing the smile “I didn’t go nuts.”

** _Flashback _ **

_“Hi Mummy!!” Ben yelled causing Mac to look up from her computer screen._

_“How was your meeting?” Will leant against the door frame, Ben clutching his hand. _

_“That guy who produces the overnight stuff was there, moaning about I don’t even know what.” _

_“Which one?”_

_“The one that looks like the guy from Lord of the Rings. The one with the beard” She gestured to her face_

_“Gimli?” _

_“No, Dumbledore.” _

_“That’s Harry Potter.”_

_“Is it?” _

_“Yeah.” He laughed “I have no idea who you’re talking about.” _

_“I thought you were learning names?” She peered over her glasses in a gesture eerily reminiscent of Dumbledore._

_“Of my staff not everyone else’s” It was a familiar banter, almost like the awkwardness of the last few days had vanished. _

_Mac was about to say something when Ben caught her attention, he was spinning in a circle still holding Will’s hand. “What did you feed him?” _

_“Why do you assume I fed him something?” Will didn’t meet her eyes_

_“I’m his mother, I recognise a sugar high when I see one.” She stared at him the accusation obvious on her face. “Benny what did you and Daddy have for breakfast?” _

_“WAFFLES! With chocolate and squirty cream” _

_“Will…” _

_“Hey, he was so good at the dentist, I couldn’t not get him a treat!” Will picked Ben up as he’d started to get wobbly on his feet, Will could only imagine the pain and suffering that would be inflicted on him if Ben spewed on her carpet in his dizzy state. _

_“You’re a push-over.” _

_“Take it back.” _

_“You spoil him Will. Which reminds me…”_

_“Uh oh.” _

_“Don’t go nuts for his birthday.” She stared him in the face. “I mean it. It’s less than a month before Christmas, you’ve got to spread the presents out.”_

_“Ok.” Will told her, easier than he normally gave in but sometimes you got to pick your battles. _

_“And vegetables this weekend Will. Seriously, he needs to eat some fruit and veg. I will ask him and he will snitch on you.” _

_“Copy that Mac.” _

** _End Flashback_ **

“It’s just a toddler t-ball set.”

“That’s going in your apartment. I’m not having hit balls all around mine.”

“There’s less glass in your apartment…” Will starts

“That sounds like a you problem Billy.”

“Hey.” Wade interrupted them and Will forced the smile on his face, especially when he saw him holding Ben. “Will McAvoy at a kids party. I’d never have guessed it.”

“Daddy!” Ben squirmed in Wade’s arms demanding to be let down. Will crouched to see his son missing the look of hurt and confusion that Wade shot in Mac’s direction.

“You’re Ben’s dad?” Wade asked

“Yeah.” Will picked him up also shooting a confused look at Mac.

“I guess I never put two and two together.” Wade was trying to keep the tone light. “I guess seeing the side by side comparison…” he looked at Will and Ben “…It should’ve been pretty obvious.”

“Honey, come help me with the gifts.” Mac said to Wade dragging him away and Will was grateful that she ended the encounter quickly.

… … … … … …

Later Wade broached the subject of appearing on the show to discuss financial crime in the segment with Sloan and Will agreed, thinking briefly about showing Mac a side by side comparison before forcing that thought in to the part of his mind where all his thoughts about reconciliation go.

**TBC… **


	9. Christmas

“Will?” Mac called as everyone filed out of the rundown meeting “Do you have 5 minutes?”

“Sure.” He waited and held the door open for her. Things were still a little strained between them, but they’d been slowly getting better since the birthday party.

“It’s only quick, I just wanted to ask about Christmas.” She said as she followed him to his office.

“Oh.” It was not a conversation Will wanted to have. He’d had Ben for Thanksgiving so it seemed only fair Mac had him on Christmas even if he wanted to spend Christmas with his son. “If you want him for Christmas…”

“You’re ok with that?” She was unsure.

No. “Yeah.” He sat behind his desk and shuffled some papers around uncomfortably “Will Wade…”

“No.”

Will was surprised “Everything is ok?” Please say no he thought before again pushing those thoughts back where they came from.

“Yeah.” Mac said quickly, a little too quickly “He’s spending Christmas with his parents.” She carried on before he could say anything “Um… Christmas is a family holiday and I don’t want him shuffling between homes and trading off every year, so I wanted to ask what you thought about maybe doing Christmas together?”

“Together?” Will was confused.

“Sure.” She didn’t sound confident in her idea “Maybe swap apartments every year? I just think…”

“Won’t it be awkward if one of us is dating?” He asked

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.” Will was pretty sure that they were already at that bridge. “If you think it’s a bad idea…”

“No, it’s fine. Christmas. Together. Your place or mine?” It was definitely a bad idea.

“Excellent.” She smiled genuinely.

… … … … … …

Christmas was coming up quickly and Will was still unsure about how Christmas was going to work but he figured if Mac was willing to make an effort to make things less weird then so was he.

“So I don’t know how this Christmas thing is going to work…” Will started and then held up a hand to cut off her protest at his statement “That doesn’t mean I’m not going to try.” Mac decided to hold in whatever she was about to say and let him finish “If in the future it doesn’t work I’d still like us to have a tradition that makes Ben, that makes us, you know…”

“Get there.” Mac smiled at him.

“I bought us tickets to the Rockettes Christmas Spectacular.” He said so quickly she almost didn’t hear what he said.

“Really?”

“Yeah, I thought it could be, you know…fun.”

“That’s nice Billy. Really nice.” She smiled a 1000-watt smile at him and Will knew he’d done well.

… … … … … …

“Looking sharp Benny.” Will smiled at his son in his Christmas jumper who grinned at the praise from his father. 

Ben ran in through Will’s front door “Be careful!!” Mac called after him laughing as she followed him through the door. “Hi Billy, merry Christmas Eve.”

“Hey Mac.” He stepped aside to let he in.

“I made us reservations for after the show.” She looked nervously at him “Ellen’s Stardust Diner.”

“The place where they sing show tunes and throw confetti at you?” He balked

“It sounded fun and it’s not like we can take a three year old to Le Bernardin.” She laughed and Will shook his head.

“Daddy?” Ben had re-appeared

“Yeah buddy?”

“Has Santa finished with my ball?” He looked up at his father hopefully.

“No, I don’t think he has.” Will answered as Ben pouted.

“Santa has his ball?” Mac asked cocking an eyebrow.

“Santa may have borrowed the ball from the T-Ball. It's the best ball and he needs to copy it so he can give other children an awesome ball for Christmas.”

“And when did Santa decide Ben’s ball was the one he needed to borrow?”

“When Ben’s ball broke some of Dad’s glassware last weekend.” He admitted begrudgingly as Mac laughed.

“I’d say I’d told you so but…”

“You’re too good for that?”

She laughed again and Will smiled “I told you so Will. Why do you think I was absolutely positive it was going to your place and not mine.”

He looked at her “I’m never above pointing out when I’m right and you’re wrong.” She shrugged and walked in to his apartment calling out for Ben. 

… … … … … …

The show had been brilliant, Will was willing to admit he’d loved dinner and Ben was so worn out from the fun he’d crashed right out in his fathers arms as they walked from Times Square back to Mac’s apartment, ostensibly to walk off their dinner but neither of them was willing to admit it was more about pretending this was their normal for a few more minutes.

Once they got back to Mac’s and Ben had successfully been tucked in to bed, Will stood awkwardly in Mac’s living room trying to figure out how to make it last longer without admitting to himself that is what he was doing.

“Sophie get back home ok?” He asked her, nodding at the bottle of wine that she held up.

“Yeah she’s really grateful for the first-class upgrade”

“It’s only money and it’s nothing in comparison for what she does for us.” Will shrugged. 

Mac smiled sadly, she wished Will would show this generous side more often, but he seemed to insist on hiding it from everyone.

“I had a nice time tonight Mac.” The admission caught them both off-guard.

“So did I.” She admitted pouring herself some more wine. They drank comfortably together swapping stories of Ben’s antics until Will finally worked up the courage to leave.

… … … … … …

“I think he’s done.” Will laughed pointing at his son who was snuggled up between his parents snoring lightly as the Grinch’s heart grew three sizes on the TV in front of them. Mac smiled and quickly reached over grabbing her cell phone and snapping a picture.

“I’ll put him to bed.” She scooped Ben up. “Shall I bring the wine we didn’t finish last night, or do you need to get home?”

“I can stay for a drink.”

Mac returned five minutes later with a bottle of wine and two glasses pouring the wine “Merry Christmas Will.”

“Merry Christmas Mac.” Will clinked his glass with hers.

“This has been wonderful. Exactly what I always wanted.” Mac admitted sadly whilst the Grinch and the Who’s of Whoville sang their Christmas song and carved the Roast Beast.

“Mac…” Will started and she turned to look at him.

“It’s Christmas let’s not…” She started but stopped when she saw the way he was staring at her.

Will lent in ready to kiss her but stopped when he realised Mac hadn’t moved.

“Billy.” She looked at him sadly. “I’m seeing someone.”

The reminder of Wade seemed to shake Will out of whatever nostalgic feelings slip-up that led to him potentially ruining what had in fact been a lovely Christmas, probably one of his favourites, and making things once again awkward and uncomfortable.

“You’re right.” He downed his glass of wine. “I think maybe, it’s Christmas, we’ve had wine and I um…”

“I totally get it.” She forced herself to look at him. “You’d have regretted it”

“Probably.” He knew he was lying about that. “I should go.”

“It’s probably for the best.” Mac agreed and she let him go, unsure which one of them was full of more regrets that Christmas. Her blackberry rang she looked down at the name. Wade. “Hi Honey.” She greeted forcing cheer into her voice, hoping he wouldn’t notice something was off.

**TBC… **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not overly happy with this chapter. I just wanted a segway to get us from the Birthday to the New Years Party and beyond. Stick with it, the next one will be better.


	10. New Years Eve

Will wasn’t sure exactly when he’d started to feel those feelings for Mackenzie, if he was being honest with himself (which is something he wasn’t willing to do) he’d never stopped feeling those feelings. He’d thought she felt the same things for him as well, but she’d made it clear she was moving on and was seeing someone new. Needless to say, these revelations had made things awkward in the newsroom over the last five days. He wasn’t sure how they were going to try and re-establish the boundaries and peace that they’d established over the last few months. He leant back in his chair and sparked up a cigarette.

He wasn’t proud, hiding from her in his office. He’d knew he’d have to face her (and him) at some point.

“I thought I saw you sneak in.” Apparently, ‘some point’ was now.

He looked her up and down, she looked incredible in the black dress “You look nice.”

“Thanks.” She smiled “So do you.”

“I was at a party at Bloombergs.”

“But you came here to be with your News Night family at midnight?” She teased

“Well near them anyway…” He shrugged

“I just came in here to check on…” She trailed off and nodded to the lump that Will had missed on the couch.

“JESUS!” He shouted realising that the lump was his son, who thankfully was sound asleep, he quickly stubbed out his cigarette and waved his hands to try and clear the smoke.

She chuckled “You could quit you know.”

He mock scowled at her.

“Wade was wondering if he could have two minutes with you?”

“Sure.” He’d make the effort, the reminder of why was quietly snoring on his couch.

They’d been talking for longer than two minutes and Mac had come back in after leaving them talk carefully balancing some champagne glasses “Honey are you saying that the US is getting out-Lawyered?”

“Don’t call him honey it drives me crazy.” It slipped out before it could stop it. “I didn’t say that, it came out of my mouth. Just words.” He looked Wade directly in the eye and could tell the other man did not believe him. “Let me talk to Mac a second.” Wade looked uncomfortable with it but left anyway and Will glared as he left.

They bickered over Wade briefly, both stopping when a little sleepy voice called out “No yelling.”

Mac went over to Ben and holding him on her hip “We weren’t yelling, it’s ok, say hi to daddy.”

“Hi daddy.” Ben snuggled against his mother and Will couldn’t help but smile at the sight before him. Mac in that dress and Ben in his tiny tux.

“Come out to the party” She asked him softly.

“I will.” He promised and he meant it.

… … … … … …

She watched him from across the room, glancing over briefly at Jim who was clearly trying to flirt with Maggie’s roommate but who’d been co-opted by Ben who was very excited to see “Uncle Jimmy”

Sloan came over and stood next to her and Wade “Why is Will talking to Nina Howard?” She asked her friend.

“You know who she is?” Sloan asked

“She’s a gossip columnist for TMI.” Mac wasn’t even sure why Nina was at the party.

“Oh he should not be talking to her.”

“Hi.” Sloan felt a tug on her dress.

“Hello.” Sloan looked down at Ben “Sloan Sabbith.” She held her hand out to Ben who grabbed it and Sloan shook it making him laugh “Who are you?”

“Benny.”

“Benny who?”

“Benny Ma Boy” He looked at his mother to see if he’d managed to pronounce it properly.

“Well done baby.” Mac smiled at him and scooped him up and looked at Sloan “We’re learning our last name” she explained to Sloan who smiled. She then made eye contact with Jim who was frantically looking for his bosses son, to let him know she had him. “Why is Will talking to her?”

“I may have suggested it.”

“Why?”

“You were here with Wade. He seemed lonely…”

“Excuse me. Benny stay with Sloan.”

Ben looked up at her “Hi.” He said again.

“Benjamin.” Sloan looked down at him wondering what she was meant to do with a however old he was.

… … … … … …

Will and Nina walked away from them and Mac looked at Sloan who was still being followed by Ben like a puppy dog

“Really?” She looked at her “You’re setting up my boyfriend…not my boyfriend.” She bumped straight in to Wade “Just words” She used Will’s own words and missed the look of hurt that crossed his face indicating he’d heard exactly what she’d said.

“Ben looks like you managed to find the prettiest date in the room. After your mom.” Wade held out a hand to hi-five Ben and Sloan was relieved to see a familiar look of scepticism cross the young McAvoy’s face as he reluctantly hi-fived his mother’s boyfriend.

Sloan, Wade and Ben stood and watched as Will crashed and burned with Nina

“What do you think he’s doing?”

“Trying to civilise her.”

“Oh that’s not going to work out well…”

“Hang on it’s coming any second.” Mac was spot on, seconds later the glass of champagne was thrown “There it is.”

Ben let out a full belly laugh as he looked at his father and Sloan couldn’t help but smile down at Ben who was still chuckling “That funny?” Sloan asked him

“Yeah.” He laughed.

Sloan couldn’t help but laugh as well “Yeah it is.” She liked Ben.

… … … … … …

** _8 days later_ **

“TELL ME WHAT I DID WRONG!” He yelled as he was dragged over the coals by Charlie, Mac and Don, who he suspected was just there to mock him.

“How about drugs.” Mac snapped and looked him in the eye. She was furious at him, she knew he smoked pot. She didn’t mind that he smoked pot she trusted him to keep it away and from Ben that he occasionally smoked the odd joint, however at this minute she needed him to know it wasn’t acceptable.

She was so angry at him she briefly tuned out of the argument that he’d been having with Charlie.

“News Corp doesn’t own TMI we do!” Wait? What. Charlie’s sentence had brought her back in to the room however, as soon as Charlie mentioned the meeting and Will’s non-compete clause she zoned straight back out again.

“Hang on.” She interrupted, the hurt she was feeling was immense and she looked Will right in the eye “You’d never allow a non-compete clause in your contract. You couldn’t stay off of television for five minutes.”

“It got put in.” He tried to dismiss her.

“When?” Mac demanded. “When Will?”

“When I re-negotiated my contract.” Will reluctantly admitted.

“To be able to fire me at the end of each week.” Mac nodded.

“Yeah.” He mumbled and she stormed out, Will quickly following. 

“JESUS CHRIST HOW MUCH DO YOU HATE ME?” She yelled as soon as she realised he was right behind her.

“I don’t hate you.” He said softly.

“You allowed a non-compete clause in your contract?” She found it hard to believe that he didn’t hate her.

“Have revenge sex with every woman in the tri-state area for all I care. But keep it out of the goddamn newspapers.” She recognised the look in his eye straight away and knew she crossed a line but she was so angry at him she continued.

“Some of us have moved on!”

“Yeah you mentioned.” Will snapped back at her

“Some of us moved on three and a half years ago!” He yelled as he followed her back into the office.

“Oh really Will and what has the last few months been then?” Mac snapped back

“Really Mackenzie?”

“It’s not just me that you need to think about Will!”

“Yeah and what are you going to tell him about why mommy and daddy aren’t together anymore?” Will fired back at her, Charlie and Don winced, it was a cheap shot.

“There’s been a shooting!” Maggie burst in to the room and the argument Will and Mac were having fizzled out as suddenly it became all hands to the pump.

… … … … … …

_“I FUCKED EVERYTHING UP!” _

_“It’s going to be alright.” _

Wil wasn’t convinced it was but as he sat on his balcony later that night laptop on the table next to him.

“Hey.” Mac greeted when she answered the phone.

“Can you speak…”

“Sure, what’s up.” 

“What happened today…” He mumbled

“It’s ok Will.”

“Is it?”

“No.” She admitted “Listen, I hurt you and you’ve got every right to be mad about it.”

“Mackenzie…”

“Will. Your apology is accepted.”

“I wasn’t…” He was

“You are.”

“Ok.” He took a breath. “Mac, that conversation that we’re going to need to have with Ben…”

“The one about why we’re…?” She trailed off

“Yeah. We’ll have it with him together.”

“Ok.” He thought he could hear her smile through the phone.

“Good night Mackenzie.”

“Good night Billy.”

He took another drag of his cigarette and hit refresh on the google search and immediately regretted it as he read the article on the TMI website.

_Will McAvoy’s Secret Love Child!_

_Will McAvoy claims to be a Republican, he claims to defend family values yet TMI has learned exclusively that he’s a father. What’s the kicker? Plenty of people Will McAvoy has never been married, our sources tell us that he had the child with ex-girlfriend come producer of his News Night Show Mackenzie McHale who you may remember famously sent an email to thousands of people announcing that she was the one who cheated on McAvoy. _

_From the photo of McAvoy and his son below, taken at a recent New York Knicks game, the often grumpy former Leno of news…_

Will slammed the lid of his computer shut and immediately re-dialled Mac’s number.

**TBC… **


	11. Chapter 11

“Hey Will…You’re not Will.” Sloan came to an abrupt halt in front of the desk, the figure sat in it shook their head. “Why are you not Will?” The person occupying Will’s seat scrunched their face up and shrugged in the most Will McAvoy-est gesture she’d ever seen. “Where’s your dad?”

“Dunno.” Ben said.

“What are you doing in here on your own?”

“Hiding”

“Hiding from what?”

“Wade”

“Why?”

“Poopy.”

“Wade’s poopy?” Sloan asked and Ben nodded. “Where’s your Mom?” again Ben shook his head. “Does she know you’re here?” Ben shook his head again. Sloan fired off a quick text to Mac who was likely panicking. A point proved when a frazzled looking Mac burst in to Will’s office seconds later.

“Benny I thought I said stay in my office?”

“Sowy mummy.” He said bashfully.

“Where’s daddy?”

“Dunno”

“Hey Mac. We’ve got the meeting up in Charlie’s office.” Don poked his head through the door.

“Have you seen Wade?” Mac asked a perplexed Don

“Umm no.”

“Damn it. He’s late.” Mac muttered.

“I’ll stay with him.” Sloan said surprising herself and Mac.

“You’re sure?” Mac said at the same time Don asked “What do you know about looking after a three year old?”

“I was just going to let him colour.” Sloan shrugged.

“Perfect.” Mac and grabbed Don by the arm before he started to provoke Sloan anymore or she changed her mind about looking after Ben.

20 minutes later Will walked in to his office and stopped in the door and took in the sight in front of him, Sloan in his office chair with Ben in her lap.

“Really?” She asked

“Yep.” Ben seemed sure of his answer.

“Poopy.”

“He plays for the Giants.” Will couldn’t help but agree that the Giants were poopy.

“Poopy.”

“He’s got a solid stock portfolio.”

“Poopy.”

“He plays a skill position.”

“Poopy.”

“He’s expanding his interests outside of football preparing for the future.”

“Poopy” Ben laughed everytime he said it.

“I disagree.” Ben shrugged at her answer.

Sloan shook her head. “Which one again?” She showed him the pictures on the Bloomingdales website.

“Bwue.”

“The Blue one?”

“Yeah. Pwetty.”

“Are you taking dating and fashion advice from my three year old?” Will interrupted

“My options in this building are limited.”

“To three year olds?”

“Well you and Kenzie are you know and Don and Maggie aren’t exactly a picture of healthy relationship. I couldn’t find Tess or Tamara and I definitely wasn’t going to ask Jim. Neal could’ve been an option but he’s afraid of me.”

“We all are.” Will pointed out as he walked in his office and sat opposite Sloan “Where’s Mac?”

“She’s at a meeting with Don, Elliot and Charlie about Elliot going to Egypt.”

“She asked you to look after Ben?”

“I think Wade is supposed to pick him up.”

“Why.”

“Wade poopy.” Ben shrugged.

“Aren’t you supposed to tell him off for that?”

“Why?”

“Aren’t parents supposed to stop their kids from calling people poopy?”

“He’s entitled to his own opinions.”

“What if he grows up and wants to be a tea party supporter?”

“Well that’s not happening.” Will grumped

“Knock Knock.” Wade appeared at the door. “Benny Boy!” He walked in to the office and went to fist bump Ben who just looked at him sceptically. “Ready to go?

“Where are you going?” Will interrupted

“Did Mackenzie not…?”

“I’m asking you.” Will pointed out

“We’re going to a Wiggles concert. I thought it would be good for us to spend a little time together.”

“Right.” Will couldn’t say he was happy about it and he might have to have a talk with Mac about Wade taking Ben places without talking to him about it.

“Wade.” Mac rushed into his office. “You’re late.”

“Sorry honey. Meeting ran late.”

“Benny.” Mac held her hand out to Ben who slid off Sloan’s lap and came round and took his mother’s hand and left Will’s office.

“Wow. That was awkward.” Sloan lent back in Will’s chair.

"Why are you in my chair?" Will asked

"Because I am." 

“Get out of my office.” He reached forward for the cigarette box on his desk.

“Right.”

… … … … … …

“Good show Billy.”

“Thanks.” He sorted his papers on the desk “Can we talk?”

“Sure.” She clicked him to just her.

“Wade’s taking Ben out on his own?”

“Yeah.”

“You think that’s a good idea?”

“We’ve been dating for five months.” Mac pointed out “Maybe we shouldn’t talk about this here.”

“My office?”

“Sure.”

She followed him out of the studio and to his office.

“I’m not sure how comfortable I am with this.”

“Will…”

“Mackenzie.”

“Is this about Christmas?” She asked nervously.

“No.”

“This is about me not being sure I want some guy I don’t know spending time with my kid.”

“Billy, I see how Ben is around him, it’s important to me that they get on.”

“I just don’t like it.”

“I know, but you need to get over it.”

“I don’t think that’s fair.”

“I don’t think it’s fair that he can’t go out with you without having to try and hide from photographers.”

“That’s not fair Mac.”

“I’m sorry Billy. I know it’s not your fault but, if he gets to go to a wiggles concert without having photographers in his face...”

“You’d rather I give up on tea party?” He didn’t want to but he would.

“Of course not.” She grumped.

“You’re killing me here Mac.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t like him.” Will pointed out.

“I know but I do.” And that was kind of the problem Will thought but he wasn’t going to express that.

“I know. It’s tough for me. Just words.” He'd prefer to have this conversation without anymore feelings slip ups. 

“You know, one of these days Will you’re going to meet someone you actually like and you’ll want them to meet Ben and I’m going to have to remind you of this.”

“Mac.”

“Billy.” She smiled softly at him.

… … … … … …

Will was watching sport centre on his couch when his phone buzzed with a text message

**From: Sloan Sabbith:**

**You mocked him but Ben’s dating advice is excellent. **

**From Will McAvoy:**

**Really?**

**From Sloan Sabbith:**

**He was poopy**

**From Will McAvoy:**

**Literally or… **

**From Sloan Sabbith:**

**You couldn’t care less about my date could you?**

**From Will McAvoy:**

**Can’t even pretend to care. **

**From Sloan Sabbith:**

**Thought so. For what it’s worth. He says the same thing about Wade. **

He took a sip of his scotch. Maybe the kid was on to something.


	12. Valentines Part 1

** Valentines: Part 1 **

“I’m sorry honey.” Wade looked at her from where he was sat tying his shoes.

“It’s a Sunday, who has meetings on a Sunday?” Mac queried

“Something came up, they’re leaving town this afternoon so if we’re going to have this meeting then it needs to be this morning. I’m sorry that I’m missing church.” He stood up and stood in front of Mac.

“I mean, you’re not Catholic so it’s ok, I was just looking forward to spending the day with all three of us.” She straightened his tie.

“Me too.” Wade admitted. “Next Sunday, we’ll definitely do it next Sunday. Just you, me and Benny…”

“Actually, Ben’s with Will next Sunday, they’re going to, I don’t know something with sports and fried food probably.”

“Have you and Will ever thought about making this arrangement more formal? Set days… I don’t want things to get nasty and it’ll make things easier to plan events…” Wade says cautiously.

“Events?” Mac interrupts

“Yeah dinner and how we’re spending the weekend rather than him telling you a few days before.”

“It works.” She points out

“For now. I just don’t want there to be fights in the future…”

“Wade…”

“I’m just saying it doesn’t look good.”

“Look good? For who?”

“Well, I just mean with the tabloid stories and what you’re saying about the Lansing’s that bitter custody disputes don’t play well and American’s still want a happy cereal box family.”

“It’s a nightly news broadcast, not the presidency.” Mac laughs “I don’t think the American public are that concerned with Will’s family life.”

“Well, maybe they are. I’m just saying, it’s something you should think about.”

“I appreciate it honey. I do, anyway, I have to go get Ben ready before we’re late.” Mac gives him a quick kiss on the lips and walks out the room.

… … … … … …

“Pray, brethren, that my sacrifice and yours may be acceptable to God, the almighty Father.” The Priest calls as Mac feels a buzzing in her pocket, it finally stopped but was followed by a text message and another. People knew not to call her at this time on a Sunday as she’d likely be in church (she didn’t go every week but was a fairly regular attender). As the reciting of the Sanctus was finished and the congregation kneeled Mac briefly remembered finding all the standing and kneeling in Church irritating as she grew up but was now glad she had an excuse to crouch down and slip her phone out of her jacket pocket, despite the look that elderly Mrs Kowalcyzk was shooting her she read the message.

**FROM ACN:**

**BREAKING NEWS. MORE DETAILS TO FOLLOW. RETURN TO NEWSROOM OR MAKE CONTACT WITH YOUR EP.**

Thankfully her phone wasn’t buzzing with further texts from staff members who couldn’t get to work.

“Sorry. Work.” Mac mouthed at her and she just shook her head in response. Mac knew the next time she went to a service she’d definitely get it in the neck but she couldn’t think about that now as the prayer finished and Mac took the opportunity to slip out of her pew and head to the back of the church not making eye contact with the people staring as she left.

She propped open the door of the small room where the Sunday school was being taught and apologised to the nun teaching. I’m sorry Sister. There’s an emergency, I need to grab Ben and run.”

… … … … … …

She arrived in the newsroom and saw all the staff gathered in the conference room waiting for her, including Will sat at the end of the table wearing his golf gear. Ben ran straight to him.

“Looking snappy Benny.” Will picked him up and sat him on his lap straightening his little clip on bow tie.

“Sorry, had to get out of church.” Mac took her place at the head of the table “We were literally in the middle of the Eucharist. Does anyone know what’s going on?”

“Ok, so it’s a drill. Scenario number 210. Death of an allies head of state specifically…” The staff groaned as Neal spoke “Hey! Don’t blame me, Mac’s the one that wanted this. I have no control over when it happens, the computer programme decides!”

“Hey!” Mac yelled “We need to be prepared, one of these days we’re going to break the biggest story of our lives and it’s going to come at the worst possible time.” She figured if she just yelled the loudest then maybe they wouldn’t realise that she was as pissed off with these monthly drills as the rest of the staff “Where are you going?” She snapped at Will who was in the process of walking towards the door.

“I’ve already broke the biggest story of my life at the worst possible time and there’s a district court judge waiting for me at a golf course in…”

“Sit your ass down.”

“Mummy sweared.” Ben laughs and Will raises an eyebrow at her but does as he’s told.

“Let’s just be glad it’s today and not in 8 days’ time.” She calms a little

“What’s in 8 days?” Jim asks

“Valentines Day.” The tone Maggie uses to answer him is one of utter disbelief “Please tell me you have something planned for Lisa.”

“Uh…”

“Never mind that now. We’re going to run the scenario. Neal if you could continue.” Mac sits and looks at him expectantly.

“Right. Scenario 210…”

… … … … … …

“Herb!” Mac called across the newsroom

“Yes boss?”

“We were 17 seconds heavy on Bernanke which meant we had to squeeze…” She walked over towards Herb only for Will to appear behind him yelling.

“Wait! Wait. Everybody watch this.” He announced

“There’s nothing to watch.” She knew where he was going with this.

“She has to subtract with her fingers.” He says smugly.

“I don’t have to.” If she was Ben she’d have stamped her foot.

“We were 17 seconds heavy on Bernanke, which means we had to squeeze Bill Kristol down to what?” Will’s smug when he says it.

Damn him. She uses her fingers “2:13” fine if he wants to play it that way she thinks “And Will took tap dancing lessons when he was 11.” It gets the requisite laugh.

They walk through the bullpen playfully bickering about This Old House. “How many kitchens do you think that house had?” He was far too close when he said that.

“That’ll do. Let’s get serious.” She says as she strides into the conference room. “I’ll begin by saying that Will cries when he watches the movie Rudy.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Cries like an onion.”

“Onions make you cry. They don’t themselves experience emotion.” He fires back.

She could’ve let it rest or she could (and did) shoot back with “The way you experience emotion when you watch Rudy.” It goes down hill from there as they get a blow by blow of the infamous “jersey scene”

Mac finally succeeds in getting the meeting back on track when Charlie interrupts and drags her and Will and out of the meeting and in to Will’s office to discuss yet another TMI story.

“Did you know that Wade Campbell is thinking about running for Congress?” Charlie asks and Mac can’t help but wonder why he didn’t say ‘boyfriend’ when he was clearly about to.

“Yeah, he’s thinking about it, but not more than that.” They’d talked about it a few weeks ago, Wade told her he’d like to run for congress one day.

“Yes, more than that.” Charlie interrupts he seems angry “He’s had meeting with senior staff of the D triple C.”

She discusses the situation with Charlie but out of the corner of her eye keeps an eye on Will who’d she’d expected to be jumping for joy at hearing that her relationship with Wade was about to come crashing down.

“How did you not know he was talking…” Will starts after Charlie leaves the office.

“He never told me. You can’t think I used you to raise his profile?” She hopes he knows she’d didn’t do this. What they had was fragile and she wasn’t sure her relationship with Will could take another knock.

“I know for sure you didn’t use me.” Well, she wasn’t expecting that answer, although he still looked pretty mad.

“He used me.” The realisation of what had happened came crashing down and she fought to keep the tears (at this point she was unsure if they were angry, sad or a mixture of the two). All those “meetings” that he’d had, including on Sunday when he’d bailed on going to church with her and Ben.

“Hey, you know what?” Will’s face had softened “Don’t assume anything. He seems like a good guy.” It was the only nice thing Mac had heard Will say about him, she didn’t know why he wasn’t lording this victory over her.

“Ben says he’s poopy.” Mac whispered and they both laughed and then there was an awkward pause.

“Plus, nobody in his right mind would risk losing you.” He didn’t look at her when he said it “Come on.” He walked out the room quickly.

… … … … … …

She looked as his name popped up on her screen after her conversation with Sloan about teaching her economics. Screw him Mac thought, and she packed up her bag and went home not caring that she’d abandoned Wade at Hang Chews.

“Mr Campbell called.” Sophie was sat on the couch reading a book when she got home. “I told him you weren’t home yet, apparently you were meant to meet him?”

“Not anymore.”

“Oh is everything…” She trailed off

“It will be.” Mac forced a smile.

“I know you said I could have the whole weekend off from tonight and I was going to leave when you got home but are you ok Mac?” It had taken a while, but Sophie had finally gotten used to calling Mac and Will by their first names (at their insistence), Wade however, was Mr Campbell having never once given Sophie permission to drop the formality.

“I’ll be fine. Go. Have a wonderful weekend with that new boyfriend of yours what’s his name?”

“Luke.” She blushed “He’s pre-law at Columbia.”

“Go, enjoy yourself! I insist.” The phone in the apartment rang, Mac quickly looked at the caller ID. It was the doorman.

“Hello?” She said into the phone.

“Hi, is that Ms McHale? It’s Tommy, the night doorman.”

“Tommy, I’m going to guess that there’s a gentleman named Wade Campbell at the desk asking for permission to come up? If I’m right just say ok.”

“Ok.” Tommy said.

“Tell Mr Campbell you’re sorry but that Ms McHale came in briefly and left again. Don’t let him upstairs. In fact, take him off the visitors list permanently. Now pretend you’re speaking to Miss Wilson.”

“Ok thanks Miss Wilson. I’ll let him know.”

Mac put the phone down making a mental note to repay the doorman for that one. She went to her liquor cabinet and opened a very nice bottle of wine, picked her largest glass and took a deep breath.

Once she was sure Sophie had left, she let the tears fall. They were very much angry tears she’d realised.

… … … … … …

As Tony Hart on ACN morning broadcast her romantic history to the entire country she launched the pen she’d been using to make notes across the room at the television screen in her office. It was a temper tantrum worthy of Ben and Will McAvoy. Speaking of Will, she knew she’d have to face him. She slowly walked into his office

She looked at him sadly, knowing how he felt about their previous relationship being broadcast for everyone.

Instead when she walked into the office all he could say was “She really wasn’t ashamed to say she had Beiber fever?”

TBC…


	13. Valentine's Pt 2

** Valentines Pt 2.  **

Mac listened to Sloan talk about Glass-Seagull or whatever it was, but all she could think about was the absolute disaster of her life. First she’d cheated on Will with Brian of all people (eew), then she ended up pregnant with Will’s baby and of course she only realised after they split up and he wouldn’t talk to her, after that came the catastrophe that was her time in the Middle East (Peabody Awards and stellar professional reputation aside), coming back and dealing with the even bigger cluster-fuck that was Will and Newsnight, having to tell Will about Ben, trying to deal with the weird relationship she’s slipped in to with Will and his confusing reaction to both her and Wade and then to top it all off she’d been completely screwed over by Wade and Will was being irritatingly understanding about the whole thing. So, she did the only logical thing she could think of and took a huge mouthful of Wine and looked at her phone again as Wade called.

“I can’t seem to stop hurting Will” There she said it, not intentionally but it slipped out and stopped Sloan talking about Gary Geiko or something along those lines (she never actually paid attention to when Wade made her watch that movie with him).

“This morning was just fucked up” Sloan’s transition from economist to best friend (or at least she thinks Sloan might be her best friend) was seamless. If only she knew that it wasn’t just this morning, it was everything from this morning back through Christmas, to North Western and that first time she answered Brian’s call after they broke up. “Is Will mad at you?”

“No.” Mac asks softly not needing Sloan to point out that actually makes her feel worse. “Do you have any human knowledge?” She asks her

“I have been told I do not.” Sloan fires back without missing a beat and eventually asks the question that Mac had been dreading “So, what happened and why can’t it be fixed?” As Mac begins to tell the story she realises she is not in the mood to get into this today and plays her Sloan Sabbith trump card and distracts her with the economy.

It partially works, right up until the part she starts to cry and Sloan again asks why can’t it be fixed?

‘Probably because I keep rejecting his attempts at reconciliation…’ Mac can’t help but think as she tries to stop crying in the middle of a bar.

… … … … … …

“Have him wait on the terrace.” Mac instructs Jim as she tells him that Wade has turned up at ACN to speak to her, not caring when he points out the freezing temperatures.

“Finally!” Wade greets her jovially as she finally joins him outside at the conclusion of the nights show. “Why’d I have to wait at here?”

“Because I wanted you to.” Until he heard her tone, Wade had no idea anything was amiss with Mac (other than the total lack of contact over the last 48hrs)

“I’ve been calling you all day…” He points out cautiously.

“When was your first meeting with the D-triple C?” Mac cuts him off before launching in to a rant about how he treated her.

“Hey! High-Road” He stops her mid-rant “This was never going to work. You and Me. Not when your ex is still here and I’ve literally gotta look at his face every day, watch the show because you’ll ask about it, look that kid in the face…”

“Don’t you dare bring my son in to this.” Then she has a thought “Were you using Ben the same way you were using me?”

“You weren’t the only one being used.” Wade deliberately doesn’t answer the question “You wasted my time and the kid was never going to accept me, so I got something out of it.”

She was furious. Was he seriously upset that a three year old didn’t like him? “In this order.” The anger barely concealed “Leave. Lose the election. Go to Hell.”

Finally, when in the relative safety (and warmth, Jim wasn’t wrong about the temperature outside) of her office, she finally calmed down in-time to pay attention to Sloan’s lecture.

It was going so well until Maggie’s roommate walked in the room shouting for Jim and he said the words “It’s Valentines day” and that, is when the thought hit her, she’d have to be quick. No telling when Will would show back up.

… … … … … …

Mac doesn’t wait for the invitation before storming into his office and she definitely doesn’t believe him when he tells her he only went out for gum. “Listen Billy, if I ever found out you paid a gossip columnist money to protect me, I will beat you senseless and you know I can do it because I’m crafty.”

“I know.” Will responds cautiously, he had a feeling that she knew exactly where he’d been, well not exactly where but, that he’d met Nina so he could pay a gossip columnist money to protect her.

Mac cuts him off before he can say anything else and calls him on the fact that she knows he was the one who paid the money to free their Egyptian stringer before calling Neal in, Neal followed by Maggie and then he notices in the memo line of the check the word “Coach” suddenly the proverbial penny drops.

Will gets up and leaves his office and see’s the line of people waiting to go in to his office, he turns and looks at Mac “You did this?”

“Happy Valentine’s Day” Is the only response Mac can muster and he pulls her in to a hug, a hug that they’re both reluctant to end until Will finally pulls away and tucks her in to his side and watches the staff snake in to his office.

… … … … … …

He leaned against the doorframe of her office “knock knock”

Mac looked up and smiled at him, he stepped in and closed the door “I just want to, uh, say thank you for organising the whole Rudy thing.”

“You’re welcome.” She furrowed her brow, he looked apprehensive for some reason. “Are you ok Will?”

“What? Yeah.” He tucked his hands in her pockets “I heard that you broke up with Wade.”

“Kind of inevitable really don’t you think?” She laughs although there’s no trace of humour in her voice. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Bringing him into our lives.” She shrugs “Bringing him in to Ben’s life, I can’t believe he did that to Ben just used him like that.”

“It’s not your fault.” He says softly

“Well Billy if it’s not mine then whose is it?”

“Mine maybe, Wade’s for sure.”

She sighed and put her head in her hands. “I was expecting you to be far more smug about this.”

“Why would I be smug about someone hurting you?”

“No reason.” She almost couldn’t believe he had to ask.

“Mackenzie…”

“Will…”

“Are you hungry?” It came out of nowhere and he wasn’t sure why he’d asked but it probably had something to do with Mac taking the conversation in direction he didn’t want to think about.

“What?” Apparently, she was as caught off guard as he was.

“Hungry? Food. Sustenance, fuel, nourishment, cuisine… come on Mac I’m running out of words here.” He smiled “I haven’t seen you eat all day.”

“And where does the great William McAvoy propose we have dinner.” She smiled at him.

“I’m sure we can get in somewhere.”

“It’s Valentine’s.” Mac laughs, the first genuine laugh she’d experienced in days although there was a question in her answer and luckily he picked up on it.

“We’re friends, we have a kid and surely this is one of those times celebrity has to help really.” He held a hand out to her.

“As much as I’d love to go out for a pity dinner with you, I’ve got to get back. Sophie is going out for drinks with her new boyfriend and just because my Valentine’s came crashing down doesn’t mean I should ruin hers.” Mac began to pack her bags.

“Jesus Mac!” He ran a hand through his hair “It’s not a pity dinner.”

“It’s not?”

“No. We’re…” He trailed off and she stared at him, she wanted him to finish the sentence, she needed him to finish the sentence. “It’s a thank you dinner”

“A thank you dinner?”

“Yes.” Both disappointed a little at the answer he gave.

“I was just going to get take-out.” She held up a hand when he started to interrupt her “I think that TMI and Page 6 would have a field day if we were photographed together out on Valentine’s Day…”

“I get it. You don’t…”

“No! Billy, I’m saying if you want to buy dinner…”

“I’m paying now am I?” He jokes

“You were going to make me pay for my own thank you dinner?” Mac picks up the banter

“What are we having?” 

“Ladies choice.”

“Chinese?”

“You order, I’ll get my stuff.” He grins at her and walks out.

… … … … … …

She surprises him when they get to her place by putting Rudy on, he’d always wondered what happened to the DVD after they split up, despite her mocking Mac had kept his favourite film. True to form he cries during the jersey scene although he staunchly denies it as she laughs at him and by the end of the film, she’s cuddled into his side with his hand absentmindedly stroking her arm. The credits rolled and neither of them moved or said anything.

“I should…” He started after the screen went back to the menu.

Mac turned and looked at him, she opened her mouth to speak although didn’t know what she was going to say when suddenly his mouth was on hers. It was soft and hesitant, and his hand came up and cupped her jaw, Mac unlike Christmas, started to respond and then almost as suddenly as it began it was over. She says nothing and at first neither does Will. 

“…Go. I should go.” He says.

“Billy…” She was confused, he made the move first (again), he’d kissed her and now he was the one pulling away?

“I’m sorry.” Will whispered.

“Why?” Surely he knew as well as she did they’d been moving towards this. There’d been so many little moments since she’d come back.

As soon as he’d kissed her alarm bells started ringing in the back of his head. Yes he was attracted to her, that wasn’t right it was just attraction he was pretty sure he still lover her, but he’d made the mistake before. Getting with her just after a break-up and suddenly he’d felt the panic rising in his chest.

“I can’t be your rebound guy again.” The unspoken meaning behind his sad words breaking both their hearts.

“Why did you kiss me?” She tries and fails to keep the hurt from her voice

“I’m sorry Mackenzie”

**TBC**


	14. Therapy

** Therapy **

“Can we talk about the ring?” Jack asks him.

“Again?” Will makes no effort to hide his exasperation with the young Habib again bringing up his cruel ring joke, well not a joke… rejoinder seems to fit better.

“Yeah.” Jack stares him right in the face. “We never got to the bottom of it.”

“There’s nothing to get to the bottom of.” Will knows he did it to lash out, what he doesn’t understand is why he lashed out, especially since he’s the one that rejected Mac this time.

“Fine.”

“We’re going to leave it?” Will asks sceptically.

“No.” At the reply from his therapist Will leans back in the chair, he should’ve gone back to skipping the appointments. “How did Mackenzie react to the ring?”

Will just stared at his therapist, how did he think Mackenzie reacted to him showing her the ring? Especially after what happened on Valentine’s day. He distinctly remembered the pained look on her face when he placed it on the desk in front of her. “Exactly as you think she would.” Will’s answer was measured and well thought, a skill that comes from years in a court room and behind an anchor desk not letting the public know he has an opinion.

“That’s not an answer Will.” The exasperation evident in his voice.

“How do you think she reacted?” Will asks angrily. “I threw her feelings in her face again.”

“Again?”

“She comes back and I’m not exactly rolling out the welcome wagon, there’s Ben…”

“Ben?” Jack’s confused he’s never mentioned anyone named Ben.

“Yeah he’s our kid.” Will waved a hand to dismiss his therapist “There’s all these thing and I…”

“You and Mackenzie have a child?” Jack interrupts

“Yes.”

“At the risk of sounding cliché how does that make you feel?”

“Being a father?”

“Having a child with Mackenzie.” Jack clarifies

“It’s not how I imagined it.” Will admits

“But you did imagine it?”

“Of course I imagined having a child with her. I thought about the whole lot marriage, babies, house in the suburbs. The whole picket fence deal.” Will was getting animated and angry “Instead I’ve got, I dunno, shared custody and this thing where I occasionally, I can’t explain it.”

“What can’t you explain Will?”

“I kissed Mackenzie.” Jack stays silent. “On Valentine’s Day.”

Jack says nothing again leaving a very pregnant pause “And I nearly kissed her on Christmas.”

“So you want to kiss Mackenzie? What happened to her being your best friend and most trusted partner?”

“She is those things.”

“You still find her attractive though.”

“Anyone with eyes finds her attractive.”

“Does everyone else act on finding her attractive?”

“I don’t act on it.” Will adds defensively

“Apart from Christmas and Valentine’s Day.”

“Those were just blips. It didn’t mean anything.”

“Didn’t mean anything to who?” Jack adds and Will just glares in lieu of an actual response.

… … … … … …

“Hey.” Mac fidgets uncomfortably in the door “How was your appointment?”

“We talked about Ben.” He offers in lieu of an answer.

“Oh.” She seems surprised “Have you not already?”

“No.” She frowns at him but doesn’t press the issue. “Did you need something?” Will asks.

“So I don’t know if you noticed but we missed our one year anniversary.” Will just scrunches up his face and looks at her like she’s speaking Greek.

“News Night.” Mac clarifies

“We covered…”

“Yeah we did a brief recap on the spill I just thought it would be nice if we, I don’t know, had a party?”

“A party?” He really thinks she might be speaking Greek this time.

“Yes. To celebrate.” She smiles at looks at him hopefully with big brown eyes and he caves instantly.

“Fine.” He tries to put on an exasperated tone and hopes she doesn’t notice. “Where are we having this party, here or…” he trails off when he says the look on her face. “No.” He says when he realises what she’s suggesting.

“Will…”

“Absolutely not.”

“Billy…”

“I mean it Mac.” He stares her down fully intending to shut down her idea of having the party at his place however, an hour later he finds himself looking up caterers having once again totally caved to Mackenzie when his phone pings with a text from Mac.

**From Mackenzie McHale**

**By the way Billy, ever since the opposition **

**research was done, they’ve been a little bit**

**obsessed with the fact you’re on a country **

**album. Please expect demands for a **

**performance. **

Will reached for the packet of cigarettes on desk and lit one briefly thinking he wouldn’t put up with this shit if he wasn’t completely in love with her but he was dammed if he knew what to do about that fact.

**TBC… **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little filler chapter to segway to the party. Not totally happy, this about the 15th draft.


	15. Chapter 15

** May 5th **

**From Mackenzie McHale:**

**I was thinking, maybe we could have dinner**

**when you drop Ben off later?**

**From Will McAvoy:**

**Sure. **

**From Mackenzie McHale:**

**My treat. **

**From Will McAvoy: **

**You’re after something…**

**From Mackenzie McHale:**

**Not at all. I resent the allegation. **

**From Mackenzie McHale:**

**I merely wanted to discuss the party. **

**From Will McAvoy:**

**I knew it. **

**From Mackenzie McHale:**

**Just for that, I’m cooking. **

**From Will McAvoy:**

**Tell my son I loved him**.

**From Mackenzie McHale:**

**It’s going to be green and healthy. **

**From Will McAvoy:**

**I’m excited to see how you burn a salad. **

**From Mackenzie McHale:**

**Fuck you Billy. **

Will chuckled and responded he’d see on her Sunday for dinner whilst trying to think of something witty to say. A small tug on his pants leg distracted him from possibly witty come backs. “Daddy why funny?” Ben asked him looking confused.

“What’s funny?” Will clarified lifting his son to his lap and Ben nodded. “Your Mommy.”

“Mummy’s here?” Ben’s head turned quickly looking for his mother.

“Sorry buddy, she’s not here.” Ben scrunched his face in confusion. “What shall we do for the rest of the day?”

“Park!” Ben yelled and Will pulled out his phone to dial Lonny. Whilst he wasn’t happy about having a body-guard, he’d play ball if it meant Ben was kept safe.

… … … … … …

“I’ll give you a call later when we’re done with dinner.” Will told Lonny as he got out of the vehicle.

“You better. You owe me one whole week of playing perfect client remember.”

“You’re going to hold me to that?” Will groused.

“Bet’s a bet McAvoy.” Lonny laughed. They’d been to the park and mini golf place on the pier and Will bet Lonny that he’d play ball with the rules for a whole week if he won, which he did, by about 5 strokes.

“Double or nothing on a full 18 tomorrow?” Will tried as he bent down and lifted a sleeping Ben out of his car seat.

“What and let Mac kill both us because you’re late for work? No thanks.” Lonny closed the door behind Will.

“Chicken.” Will challenged.

“Absolutely.” They walked to the door. “Remember, you even think about leaving you call me.”

“Sure thing Chief.” He said as Mac’s doorman opened the door for them.

“Bye bye Wonny.” Ben mumbled from where he was cuddled into his father’s shoulder.

“See ya later alligator” Lonny held out a fist and Ben reached up and fist bumped him before turning and leaving.

“Ms. McHale said you can go right on up.” The doorman said and Will just nodded at him.

A couple of minutes later Will was knocking on the door to Mac’s apartment holding a once again sleeping Ben.

“Hi.” Mac smiled at them. “What did you do to him?” She reached for her child, stroking his hair.

“We’ve been at the park and playing mini golf” Will smiled at the contended little sigh that escaped Ben as a result of his mother’s attentions.

“Go put him down for nap. We’ll wake him for a dinner in a little while.” She stepped back and allowed Will into her apartment.

After putting Ben down Will joined Mac in her living room, she handed him a glass of scotch which he took and sat opposite her in an overstuffed armchair.

“Thanks for the drink.” It was awkward but then, it had been awkward in their private interactions ever since Valentines.

“No problem.” She didn’t quite know what to say. “It’s weird right?”

“A little” He shrugs, thinking of course it was weird. It was weird, it was awkward and he wasn’t going to deny it was totally his fault. “What’s for dinner?”

“Oh. I made a lasagne.” She smiled.

“You followed through on cooking then?” He laughed. “Should I be worried?”

“I guess we’ll find out.” She sips her wine. “So, did you have any thoughts about the party?”

He smirks “Not having it was my only thought.” He holds a hand up to cut her off “I know that’s not an option so you tell me what we’re doing and we’ll go from there.”

“Will…” Mac starts exasperated

“I didn’t say no Mac. I’m happy to be at the party, I’m happy to host the party but you’re the one producing the party.”

“Producing the party.” Mac shakes her head.

“You produce most of my life…” He starts

“With varying degrees of success.” She sips her drink and stands as they timer goes off. “Dinner is ready go and get Ben.”

“Copy that.” He calls as he heads down the hallway to get Ben.

“You’re making a speech by the way.” Mac calls after him as he heads down the corridor.

… … … … … …

“Daddy!!” Ben yells as he runs through Will’s hallway searching for his father.

“Ben!” Mac hurries after him.

“Hi?” Will calls out.

“Sophie is picking him up in a little while.” Mac calls as she chases Ben towards the living room where the caterers are setting up. “Benny go play in your room” She see’s him in his fathers arms and smiles.

“Have you prepared a speech?” She asks him

“I was hoping you’d forget.” Will points out

“Mummy always members Daddy.” Ben whispers loudly.

“Thanks buddy.” Will stage whispers back and Mac laughs.

“You’ve got an hour Will.” Mac turns around and goes to talk to a caterer and Will allows his glance to linger on her legs a little longer.

“Daddy?” Ben asks causing his fathers attention to snap back to him. “Twouble?”

“Oh yeah buddy. I’m definitely in trouble.” His gaze drifts back towards Mac.

… … … … … …

“Ben still mad he couldn’t stay for the party?” Will asks as Mac slips back into the room.

“He’ll get over it.” She gratefully accepts the drink from Will who just smiles at her. “You should probably say a few words.”

“Really?” He’d hoped he’d gotten out of it.

“Yeah.” Mac smiled at him.

“What do I say?”

“What do you want to say?”

“Please get out of my home?” He tries and Mac glares at him.

“Everyone!” Mac yells to get everyone’s attention. “Will wants to say a few words.”

“I really don’t.” He looks at Mac and grins, he’s enjoying winding her up “But here you all are in my apartment. Socializing. Co-workers, friends…” He looks back to Mac “…family. Just like in my nightmares.” Everyone laughs and he goes on about the various forms of Newsnight 2.0 “…And please know from the bottom of my heart, that I’m not going to think it’s rude if you leave early.” Another laugh as everyone goes back to the party “Good?” He looks at Mac again and smiles at her.

“Goosebumps.” She says sarcastically and he laughs.

“I’m putting my many years as a speechwriter to use.”

“Really?” She finishes what’s left of her wine “I must have missed of it.”

Will chuckles. “Enjoy the party Mackenzie. I’m going to see a man about a cookie.”

Mac watches confused as he walks away.

… … … … … …

Will collapses on his couch and just takes it all in. Thankfully things are starting to feel a little clearer and he looks around the room at the remains of the party and thinks back to a few hours ago (it feels like days) when everyone was in his home because Mac had asked him to throw a party and he hadn’t let her down.

Mac.

He can’t stop thinking about her. She was incredible tonight, getting him through the biggest high of his life, she was… is amazing and he needs to tell her. He needs to tell her a lot of things. ‘Fuck it.’ He thinks, he’s going to call her.

He grabs his cell phone and steps out on to the balcony and dials. Voicemail, he laughs. Of course it went to voicemail.

“Hey. It’s me, Will.” Get it together McAvoy he thinks “Listen, I swear I’m not just saying this because I’m high. If the answer is no, then please do me a favour and don’t call me back or bring it up or anything. But I have to tell you, after tonight, I really wanted to tell you that I’ve never stopped. I’ve never stopped loving you. You were spectacular tonight.” He took a deep breath. “Can you believe we got Obama?” and then he hung up.

… … … … … …

She never called back. He sits in his office chain smoking the day after the day after Bin Laden. He wonders if he should check if she got the message before reminding himself not to be an idiot. Mac always checks her messages and she always calls him back.

“Earth to Billy.” He looks at the door, she’s leant against the frame and as per usual he lets his gaze drift down to her legs and back up again. “We need to talk.”

‘Ok’ He thinks, maybe she just needed a bit of time. That’s cool, he can’t blame her, it’s not like he’s been overly clear about his feelings recently. Definitely a lot of mixed signals.

“Yeah I think we do.” He stands and goes over to where she’s stood.

“Listen.” Something in Mac’s tone isn’t right, it’s far to strict for her to be telling her she loves him too “What you do in your own time is your business but the other night I put you on the air and you couldn’t even feel your face.” She steps further into his office and leans against the wall whilst he goes back to his desk. “That can’t happen again. The pot needs to stop Will.”

“The pot?” Totally not where he thought this conversation was going to go.

“What if Ben finds those cookies?” She’s angry “What if Ben see’s you when you’re high?”

“Mac…” He’d been expecting the freak out about putting him on national television whilst high to break the biggest story of the last few years.

“I know you’d never…” The thought trails off “Not intentionally. Please Will.”

“It’s not like I’m an addict…”

“I’m not saying you are but it’s already been in the papers and it’s not just you that you need to think about is it. After that drug fuelled dating disaster we don’t need everyone thinking you’re just some crazy stoner.”

“Ok.” He says.

“Ok you mean it or just say Ok so I shut up?” She asks and looks at him pointedly.

“Ok I mean it.” She’s right and this is not the conversation Will wants to be having with her.

“Good.” And with that Mackenzie leaves his office almost as suddenly as she appeared in it.

He lights another cigarette.

‘So it’s a no then.’ He thinks and then he feels his heart break and he’s furious he let it happen again.

**TBC… **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, borrowed some dialouge from Mr Sorkin. It's not mine, can't take credit.


	16. Hospital

Her first thought when she’s led into Will’s hospital room is relief, she can see his chest rising and falling and there’s a steady beep from the machine next to him reassuring her that he was alive. It was far removed the abject terror she’d experienced when she’d walked in to his apartment and found him lying on the bathroom floor a few hours earlier.

** _Flashback_ **

_The ride from Will’s apartment to the ER had been a blur, she felt dizzy being helped out the ambulance by one of the paramedics and mindlessly followed the gurney through the doors. Eventually she was directed to a waiting area whilst Will was taken into surgery so they could check the damage. Her head was spinning. He’d been taking anti-depressants; he was suffering, and he’d never mentioned any of it to her. She thought they were getting closer but obviously not._

_Charlie came and sat next to her not that she noticed until his hand squeezed hers. _

_“He’ll be fine Mac.” Charlie sounded sure._

_“Will he?” She asked, physically yeah but mentally? The last year or so had been a roller coaster of emotions and some weird moments between them and now it had all come to a head and they were sat in the ER after finding him covered in blood on his bathroom floor. _

** _End Flashback_ **

… … … … … …

She leaves Jim in charge of the Newsroom and the rundown meetings telling him she’ll be back in time for the show but she’s going to visit Will and if they needed her she could be reached on her cell. When she gets to the hospital she frowns when she see’s the magazine cover on his chest and she briefly feels sad for him before she remembers Brian wrote it and that was entirely Will’s own stupid decision, she also recalled the pain she saw seeing him again in the newsroom.

** _Flashback _ **

_Mac walked back into the bullpen and stopped dead in her tracks, she was 100% convinced she was seeing ghosts or, she was trapped in a nightmare. “Ouch!” she pinched herself, ok so it definitely wasn’t a nightmare. This means that her only logical option was she had a brain tumour or an embolism that was bursting or maybe a stroke because there was absolutely no way that she was staring at Brian Brenner walking in to Will’s office with Will of all people. _

_… … … … … … _

_“Hey Mac.” She knew that voice and she looks up and there he is. Brian with his cocky smirk darkening her doorway once again. _

_“Brian.” She says coolly._

_“How have you been?”_

_“Well.” None change in tone._

_“Mac.” He tries slight pleading tone. _

_“What?” Mac has zero interest in what Brian has to say. _

_“Will gave me full access…”_

_“Hmmm.” Will. Words would be had with Mr McAvoy. _

_“To interview the staff...”_

_“I’m not Will’s staff.” Not technically true but Brian didn’t need to know that. _

_“Really, the managing editor doesn’t have a say…” He shakes his head “How’s working with Will now that he knows that we were still togeth…”_

_“No.” Mac snaps. “Brian. Off the record…” She’s not falling for his tricks. “I don’t know why you’re here. You can interview the staff and you can write about the show. I have no interest in being part of Will’s latest love me please vanity project however, let me clarify one thing, you and I were not together. You and I were a mistake. A mistake I made because I was young, dumb and thought you loved me. I was in a relationship with Will not you. I cheated on Will not you and now I work 30 feet away from the life I could’ve had.” _

_“Are you done?”_

_“That’s all I have to say to you Brian.” _

_“Sure. We’ll talk later.” He walks out of her office but just before he goes through the door he turns and looks at her, offers another smirk and goes “Cute kid by the way.” _

_Mac pulls a face and turns to look at Ben who’d she forgotten was quietly playing on the floor in the corner. _

_“Mummy?” Ben is looking at her confused. “Who that?”_

_“That’s Brian.”_

_“Oh.” He ponders for a second. “Don’t wike Bwian.” _

_“No baby. I don’t like Brian either.” Mac walks over and scoops him up. _

_“Bwian poopy.” She’s not sure if it’s a statement or a question. _

_“Brian’s very poopy.” Mac agrees. _

** _End Flashback _ **

Will finally starts to wake up and Mac is grateful, she’s been visiting him nearly everyday so she’s glad this is one of the days where he’s finally going to be awake whilst they’re in the same room. She smiles weakly at him when he opens his eyes. “You were sleeping for a while.”

“Hmmm” He makes a vague noise of agreement as he starts to wake up.

“That’s good you need to rest.” She eyes the magazine carefully, picking it up and looking at the cover, at first Will thinks she looks like she might cry. He’s wrong as instead she uses the magazine to beat him with. “Why, why did you do this? What is wrong with you?!”

“You’re hitting me?” He puts his hands up to defend himself.

“I’ve been waiting two days to hit you!” She snaps at him before throwing the magazine down.

“I appreciate your patience.”

“I don’t want your wise-ass remarks.” She comes around the bed and sits on the end, Will braces himself for the next onslaught “You’ve got a child Will.” He immediately recognised that as a bad sign, he’s Will when he’s in trouble and Billy when it’s ok. “You’ve got to stop being so sad about this.”

“I’m over it.” He tries before recoiling in horror as he thinks she’s going to hit him again.

… … … … … …

Mac returns the next day with Ben in tow. “Daddy!” Ben rushes in the room and goes to climb on the bed.

“Careful Benny. Daddy isn’t feeling very well.” Mac manages to catch Ben lifting him and gently tucking him in to his fathers side.

“I’m ok Benny” Will wraps an arm around his son and Mac just looks at him, she hadn’t quite finished her yelling from the day before but now wasn’t the time.

“Mr McAvoy.” Will’s doctor walks in the room. “How are you feeling today?”

“Peachy.” Will looks at him.

“We need to talk again about a care plan for when you’re released.” The doctor tries.

“I’m fine.” Will waves a hand and dismisses him.

“Mr McAvoy. You had a very serious medical episode, now it could’ve been much worse but I really think you should have someone stay with you. Family or a friend. Just think about it, it might make me think about letting you outta here a little sooner.”

“I’ll think about it.” Will tells his doctor with zero intention of doing just that, Will’s doctor nods and walks out of the room.

“Will…” Mac starts.

“No.” Will cuts her off before she even gets the chance to suggest what Will knows she’s suggesting.

_‘That’s what you think Billy boy’ _Mac thinks as she just smiles at him.

… … … … … …

Nurse Cooper walks out of the room after yelling at Will about voter ID and a small voice pipes up from the couch where he had been fascinated by the giant teddy that someone had felt it was necessary to send Will. “She’s funny.” Ben laughs “I like her.” Will just scowls in his son’s direction.

Charlie chuckles and tells Will “I kinda want to see it on the news too.”

Will just closes his eyes in exasperation. “Will?” Mac tries to get his attention.

“The voicemail message…” Will starts and Mac wonders what the hell he’s talking about.

“What are you talking about?”

“The voicemail message I left you that night after I got home from the Bin Laden broadcast. Did you play it for anyone?” He asks and Mac racks her brain trying to figure out what voicemail he’s talking about.

“I never got a voicemail message”

“No, I left you the message it starts ‘hey, it’s me listen I’m not just saying this because…” He trails off and looks in Ben’s direction and mouths the word “high” at Mac.

They bicker about the voicemail for a short while until Will looks at Charlie in realisation “Nina’s first source was you.”

A million and one thoughts burst in to Will’s head as Charlie points out that Mac’s voicemail was hacked and deleted, he’s not willing just yet to consider how this might change things so he starts pulling out wires and launches into Don Quixote’s speech from the end of the book.

“Get back in bed!” Mac yells and catches him as he loses his balance, Nurse Cooper comes rushing back in and demands to know who pulled the wires out.

“She did.” Will points at Mac and Ben who’d come to stand next to the nurse tugs on her pant leg.

“Daddy did it.” He whisper’s loudly and briefly Will thinks he may have to have a conversation about how to effectively whisper because clearly Ben isn’t very good at it and also about how to have someone’s back, instead he settles for just getting as much information about the mean nurse’s great aunt.

Information which he double checks as they’re filling out the AMA paperwork at the desk.

“Is someone staying with you?” Nurse Cooper asks

“I’ll be fine.” Will says at the same time Mac says “I will.”

“No.” Will looks at her.

“Yes.” Will’s surprised that this time Mac’s voice is joined by Charlie’s.

“You’re not staying on your own.” Charlie puts his foot down. “Clearly you need a bit of help. It’s a couple of days what’s the worst that can happen, you end up in hospital? Will says nothing, knowing it’s a battle he can’t win but refusing to voice his agreement on principle alone.

“Go home. I’ll see you both tomorrow.” Charlie tells them.

… … … … … …

“Don’t you need to go home and pack?” Will asks Mac as they ride the elevator up to Will’s apartment.

“I dropped bags off for Ben and I when your doctor first mentioned you’d need someone to stay with you.” Mac says flippantly and Will just looks at her. Of course she’d been planning on staying ever since his doctor put the idea in her head.

“Where are you staying?” He asks, he has a three bedroom apartment, his guest room quickly became Ben’s room (which he’s ok with, he doesn’t like guests anyway) and the smaller third bedroom became a home office.

“Well I don’t think I’ll fit on Ben’s bed especially when you consider other than the fact it’s built for toddlers, he likes to alternate between star fish and cosy burrito.” Mac starts and Will starts to panic until she finishes “I’ll be on the couch.”

He’s not sure why, but he’s not sure how he feels about that (or rather he refuses to think about how he feels about that).

**TBC…**


	17. The First Night

Will and Mac followed Ben as he ran in to the apartment “Benny slow down!” Mac calls after him as he rushes in.

“He’s fine Mac.” Will offers as he walks slowly behind her, realising he’s moving slightly slower Mac turns and looks at him.

“Are you Ok Billy?”

“I’m fine.” He tries whilst Mac just shoots him a look that tells him he needs to stop staying it.

“Mummy?” Ben runs back to them “Daddy?” He looks up at them.

“Yeah buddy?” Will looks at him thankful for an excuse to end that conversation with Mac.

“Hungy.” Ben whines.

“Oh, you’re hungry?” Will asks him and he nods. “Let’s see what we’ve got.”

Mac beats him to the refrigerator opens it and shakes her head in exasperation. “Really Will?” She steps back so he can see inside “Empty.”

“Wasn’t exactly expecting guests.” He figures that the housekeeper threw anything that was going to go off whilst he was in the hospital. “We’ll just get some take-out.”

“Take-Out? You’ve just got out of the hospital, you need real food.”

“It will be fine.”

“Stop saying it’ll be fine!” She yells at him and storms off, he just throws his hands in the air and looks at Ben who nods when he says “Pizza?”

The pizza arrives at the same time as Mac, who Will hadn’t even realised had left the apartment. “There’s pizza, it’s got vegetables on it.” He offers weakly and she just shakes her head

“Will, you need to…”

He holds his hands up “I know. I called ordered some groceries on-line. They’ll be here tomorrow.” He looks down at her hand which is clutching a plastic bag. “Although it looks like I shouldn’t have bothered.

“I just got a few things from the bodega.” She says in a tone that indicates he is not forgiven. “I needed to clear my head before…”

“Before you start beating me again.” Will tries to joke.

“Do I like I’m in the mood for humour?” She asks him pushing past him and in to apartment where she goes to the kitchen and puts away her groceries. Will smiles softly when he notices that she picks up a slice of the pizza.

… … … … … …

The awkwardness between Mac and Will doesn’t really stop through the night and they awkwardly move around each other not really speaking until it’s time for Ben to go to bed, he demands a bed time story which Will is more than happy to read to him if it helps him awkwardly avoid conversation with Mackenzie.

He finishes reading Ben’s story and decides to sit out on the balcony, he goes to pour himself a scotch and thinks better of it (read: he doesn’t want to deal with another lecture from Mackenzie) so pours himself a glass of a water instead and goes to sit on his favourite lounger. He gets outside and realises that someone is already sat in his favourite lounger.

“Hi.” He says quietly and sits in the lounger next to her.

Mac sips her glass of wine and looks at him. “Done hiding?”

“I wasn’t hiding Mac.” Will grumps and she gives him that look that means she knows he’s lying to her.

He clearly wasn’t going to open up on his own so Mac tries another tactic “You frightened me Billy.” She admits. “Seeing you on the floor covered in blood, no idea if you were dead or alive, whether or not I had to tell Ben his father wasn’t coming back…” She trails off and shakes her head.

“I’m sorry I scared you.” He really means it, he didn’t mean to scare her and then he thinks back on the last few months stretching back from where he shoved a ring in her face (although he still wasn’t prepared to think about his real reason for buying the ring, nor his unwillingness to return it) and to more recently bringing Brian in for in his words a side-by-side comparison. “I’m sorry I keep hurting you as well. I don’t know why I do it.”

Mac laughs mirthlessly “I do. It’s because I hurt you Billy.” She shakes her head, she doesn’t want to argue tonight and this conversation is likely to lead to an argument. “I see why you like to brood out here.” She takes in the view of the city stretched out in front of her.

Will sighs, this is typical of them refusing to really talk about them or their problems. It’s probably part of the reason why things crashed and burned so spectacularly the first time. He stands walks over to her lounger and places a kiss on the top of her head (nope. Not thinking about that one either) “I’ll leave you to your brooding.” He goes to walk away turning back before he goes through the sliding doors “I really am sorry Mackenzie.”

… … … … … …

Will can’t help but stare up at the ceiling unable to sleep. He has a million thoughts running through his head but the one he keeps coming back to is the conversation with Charlie. Mac’s phone was hacked. Here he was thinking she didn’t feel the same and in actual fact she didn’t know how he felt. She never rejected him and he doesn’t know how to process that.

He looked at the clock and saw it was 2am, he swung his legs out of the bed and padded quietly into the front room “Mac?” he whispers in the darkness as he approaches the couch.

“Hmmm?” She responds and he’s relieved he finds her awake.

“I uh…” Suddenly the words seem difficult, they were so easy to say a few weeks ago and now they stick in his throat. He decides on another plan “Are you ok?” He asks before quickly clarifying “Sleeping on the couch?”

“It’s a very comfy couch Will.” She tells him and as his eyes adjust to the dark, he sees her sit up and goes and sits next to her. “I’ve slept in worse places.”

He makes a decision before he chickens out. “I think you’re done sleeping in uncomfortable places.” He takes her hand and pulls her up, leading her to the bedroom and never once letting go of her hand.

“Will?” She questions looking at his bed.

“It’s a king, plenty of space for us both Mac.” He gets in on what was always his side of the bed and after a moment of hesitation he notices that she gets in on the other side although she stays tucked in the side of the bed.

He’s not 100 percent sure what caused him to invite Mac into his bed, he doesn’t know what to do now she’s here and he’s not convinced it’s his smartest move and probably won’t help his little insomnia problem.

… … … … … …

Somehow Will does manage to fall asleep although Mac stays awake a little longer trying not to read too much into what Will’s thought process is or what the hell is going through his mind. He’s the master of mixed signals, one day he kisses her, then he brings Brian in order to punish her, he doesn’t want her staying at his apartment and then he wants her in his bed? She looks at him sleeping and wonders what the hell is going through his head before she falls into an uneasy sleep.

Mac awakes at about 5:45am and this time finds that she’s somehow migrated in to the middle of the bed and Will is spooning her, careful to not wake him (he really does need to rest) she slips out of the bed and goes back to the couch hopeful that Ben hasn’t woken and gone looking for his parents as she doesn’t want to confuse him as well with what’s happening. She’s already confused enough for them both.

Thankfully she was on the couch pretending to sleep as Ben comes rushing in “Mummy!” He yells as he jumps on her just before 6am

“Ssshhh.” She whispers “Daddy’s still asleep.” Ben pouts “Let’s watch some cartoons for a little bit and then we’ll have some breakfast when Daddy wakes up.” Ben ponders this for a moment and agrees before snuggling into his mothers side as they watch some programme about what Mac considers to be a very rude pig.

“Why is the tortoise in the tree?” Comes a gruff sleepy voice from behind Mac and Ben a couple of hours later “Tortoises can’t climb trees.”

“Hi Daddy.” Ben doesn’t even turn around he’s engrossed in the episode of Peppa Pig.

“What the fu…” Will stops himself before he swears “Why is there an elephant and cow in the tree now?”

Mac gets up and places a hand on his arm “Don’t think about it too hard Billy, you’ll hurt yourself. I’m going to make breakfast watch cartoons with your son, you might learn something”

“I’m a grown man I don’t need to watch cartoons.” He grumps and throws himself on the couch next to Ben. “Hey.” He nods at Ben as they get engrossed in the cartoons, although Will decides that he’s going to introduce Ben to real cartoons like Tommy and Jerry or Scooby Doo but the originals, not the watered down crap they put on the TV now.

“Breakfast!” Mac yells from the kitchen and Will switches the TV off and walks into the kitchen and stares at the scene in front of him. Next to Ben’s sippy cup are a bowl of fruit loops and then two bowls of oatmeal and some sliced apples.

“What’s this.” He points at it.

“A high fibre healthy breakfast option” She smiles at him and whilst Will is happy about the smile, last nights frosty attitude having disappeared he can’t say he’s overly happy about the breakfast. Something Mac appears to realise “I put cinnamon sugar on it for you.”

“So kind” He grumbles as he sits and stares longingly at the sugary cereal his son is eating.

They sit and have what turns into a fairly pleasant breakfast together and Mac sips her coffee and stares at Will having a very animated discussion with Ben about why rabbits don’t really fly helicopters. “Billy?”

“Yeah?” He looks at her.

“What did the voicemail say?” She asks.

He goes wide eyed and turns back to ben “Rabbits simply don’t have the dexterity to operate the controls of complex machinery like a helicopter. Do you understand me?”

Ben laughs “Nope.”

“It’s the thumbs.” He wiggles his thumbs at Ben who just laughs at him, Mac can’t help but join them.

**TBC…**


	18. Sleep Overs

“Seriously, Sorority Girl?” Will looks at Mac from where he’s sat next to her in the car.

“Her name is Jenna.” Mac tells him as she scrolls through her phone.

“Whatever.” He pulls out his own phone.

“What did the message say?” She tries again.

“It’s not important.” He looks out the window at the lights of the city.

“Obviously it is.” She refuses to drop it, clearly her lack of response to the message that apparently she wouldn’t be able to forget, but he did was why Brian ended up back in their lives causing carnage.

“Look. We’re home.” He points out as they pull up in front of the building and then Will slides out the car and holds out a hand to help Mac out.

“Will.”

“Don’t worry about it Mackenzie. Let’s go home, check on Ben and have some dinner yeah?”

She decides to pester him about the message another time, for now though dinner seemed like a start.

They rode upstairs in companionable silence, far removed from the awkwardness of the night before.

“You check the kid, I’ll get us started on dinner.” He tells her as he lets her in to the apartment ahead of him and eventually he finds her sat on the couch watching the end of Terry Smith’s Capitol Report.

“Dinner’s ready.” He smiles at her and she follows him through to the kitchen happy at her reaction when she sees he’s made them a healthy stir-fry complete with chia seeds sprinkled on top.

“Billy I’m impressed.” She looks at him proudly.

“Hmmm.” He just hums in agreement. “All high in fibre.”

“Probably a more appropriate before bed snack than those egg and bacon sandwiches you used to eat.” She picks up her fork and dives into the meal.

_‘You have no idea’ _Will thinks and starts to eat his own meal.

They’re both still sat at the table just talking and watching Elliot’s show when Mac looks at him “We should go to bed.” She tells him and then quickly adds “You should go to bed. I should go to the couch.”

“Mac…” Will sounds exasperated.

“Billy?” What she wouldn’t give to know what was going on his head.

“You don’t have to sleep on the couch.” He thought he made that clear last night.

“What is going on with you Will?” She asks him, the confusion obvious on her face.

“I don’t know.” It’s honest he supposes even if it’s not a real answer.

“You’re sending a lot of mixed signals here Will.” She picks up the remote and turns off the television. “You went to kiss me at Christmas and again on Valentines and then you’re back to hating me and then the next thing I know you want me to sleep with you, well not sleep with you but you know…” She loses track of her thoughts “It’s an emotional yo-yo with you and I don’t know what you want from me.”

“I’m sorry Mac.” He looks down at the table.

“What do you want Billy because at the moment I feel like I’m living on the edge waiting for what ever is going on in your head to explode out of you so I’d rather hurt locker whatever’s going on with you now and move on.”

“You want to move on?” He looks at her panicked.

Shit. She hadn’t meant to say it like that. “I feel like I’m in some weird suspended state where every time I feel like I’m finally ready to move on because you keep telling me to, but then you stop me from doing it. I don’t know what you want Billy. What I want is just some clarity in my life about what we are. Are we a ‘we’ or are we friends who happen to have a kid, are we ex’s with a kid are we working on it or what?”

“I’m working on it but, Mac…” He takes her hand. “I need you to give me some time.” Then before he loses his nerve he leans forward and captures her lips in a kiss where he tries to pour all the feelings he can’t yet put in to words. “Small steps Mac.” He whispers as he breaks the kiss.

“That doesn’t answer my question Billy.” She reaches out and takes his hand.

“Right now I want to go to bed.” He looks her in the eye. “With you. If that wasn’t clear enough.” He then adds “I can’t answer your question yet.”

“Kissing me and taking me to bed isn’t a small step Will.” She looks at him sadly.

“Nothing’s going to happen Mac, I just don’t like the thought of you on the couch.” 

She’s more confused now than she was at the start of the conversation but he’s trying, and she figures she’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and go with it for now. She doesn’t want to but, she loves him and as much as she might feel like she wants to, she can’t stop. She decides to get up early again and slip back to the living room before Ben figures out something is different. She can’t have him as confused as she is and she doesn’t want to get his hopes up like hers.

… … … … … …

It works for a few days. There’s been no more kisses but every night they go to bed together and then Mac gets up at around 05:30am and slips out of Will’s room (which Will doesn’t like but he doesn’t want to start an argument) and goes back to her makeshift bed on his couch. So far Ben hasn’t given any indication he’s noticed any sort of monumental shift in his parent’s relationship (and Mac’s not entirely sure that there has been one).

Ben McAvoy pushes out of his bedroom three days after Will and Mac’s kitchen conversation and new bed sharing arrangement. He’s sniffling and there’s tears still wetting his cheeks as he clutches Pengy the Penguin close to his chest. His first thought after he wakes from his nightmare is to search out his mother but she’s not where she should be and this frightens him further. The tears start again so he goes to his father’s room.

“Daddy?” He cries loudly as he pushes open the door. “Wost Mummy!”

Will sits up and displaces Mac who’d been sleeping on his chest as he gets out of bed. He scoops up Ben and uses a free hand to wipe away his tears. “Oh buddy, it’s ok. Mommy isn’t lost.” Will tries to soothe the toddler.

“Benny it’s ok. I’m here.” Mac sits up in the bed and Ben wiggles in his father’s arms and holds his arms out towards his mother. Will getting the idea walks back over to the bed hands Ben off to Mac and slips in the bed next to her wrapping an arm around her as she cuddles Ben. “Hey, it’s ok. What’s wrong?”

“Wost.”

“All this because you couldn’t find me?” Mac asks him softly and strokes his hair and he shakes his head.

“Bad dweam” He mumbles as he hugs Pengy tighter.

“You had a scary dream?” Will asks and Ben mumbles a quiet yeah. “It’s ok. Sometimes I have scary dreams too.”

“Yeah?” Ben looks up at his father with his tear stained cheeks

“Yeah and do you know what makes me feel better?” He asks Ben who shakes his head.

“Tickle fights!” He starts to tickle Ben who stops crying and start giggling especially when Mac gets in on the fight and starts to tickle him too.

Once he’s calmed down and the giggles have subsided, he’s tucked in between his parents who are smiling at each other. There’s a goofy side to Will that very few people get to see, and Mac counts herself lucky that she and Ben are included in that.

“Mummy?” Ben asks and Mac tears her eyes away from Will to look at him, once he’s sure he’s got Mac’s attention “Why in Daddy room?”

“Uhhh” Mac looks at Will slightly panicked.

“Sleep-over.” Will says quickly and Ben’s attention swaps to Will. “Like Peppa and her friends in the episode we watched this morning.”

“Oh.” Ben says seemingly satisfied at the answer, he snuggles into his father’s pillow clutching his penguin and falls back asleep.

Will looks at Mac and shrugs.

… … … … … …

“Kenzie!” Sloan yells when it becomes apparent that Mac isn’t listening to her.

“Sorry.” Mac shakes her head. “I didn’t sleep well.” She’d struggled to go back to sleep after Ben woke them up and spent most of the night pondering the state of her (non-existent?) relationship with Will.

“Are you still at Will’s?” Sloan asks.

“Yeah.”

“How’s that going?” Sloan sips from her coffee.

“It’s going. It’s weird.” Mac admits not giving much away. She’s not sure if she should talk to Sloan about this, her relationship advice isn’t always the best.

“Hey.” Will appears in the doorway apparently saving her from the conversation. “Someone wanted to say hey before he went back to day care.” He steps in the door and Ben jumps through.

“Hi Mummy!” He notices Sloan as well “Hi Auntie Swoan”

“Did you have a nice lunch with your dad?” Sloan asks and Ben nods before coming up and standing in front of her.

“Auntie Swoan?” He mumbles nervously looking at the floor. Mac smiles, Ben clearly has a little crush on Sloan, she catches Will’s eyes and they share a smile at the cuteness of it.

“Yeah?” Sloan looks at him

“Do you want a sweep ober?” He asks and Mac’s eyes go wide whilst Will tries not to laugh.

She looks at him and then up at Will who mouths ‘sleep-over’ at her.

“A sleep over?” Sloan asks not sure what she’s supposed to say.

“Yeah.” He nods “Like Mummy and Daddy and Peppa.” He states confidentially.

“Pepper?” Sloan is confused.

“Pig. Peppa Pig.” Will clarifies quickly. “The cartoon character.”

Sloan nods and tries to fight back the smile “Do Mommy and Daddy have sleep-overs?” She asks Ben who nods, unaware that he’s just broken the biggest story in the history of ACN. Sloan looks at Mac who has a look of horror on her face.

“Time to go back downstairs Benny.” Will quickly scoops Ben up and leaves Mac in her office with an overly-excited Sloan.

“Coward.” Mac mutters under her breath as Will flees the room.

“So…” Sloan leans back in her chair. “You and Will have been having sleep-overs.”

“Uhhh.” Realising it might be good to talk to someone. “Yeah.”

“So are you?” She asks.

“No. I don’t know. Maybe?” Mac puts her heads in her hands. “We go home every night have dinner and go to bed. Then we get up in the morning and have breakfast with Ben and pretends nothing’s happened.”

“Has anything, you know, happened?” Sloan whispers like it’s a big conspiracy.

“No, no. Yes.” Mac’s voice gets slightly higher as she admits to the kiss.

“Is it a no nothing happened or yes something happened?” Sloan’s confused.

“There was a kiss.”

“A kiss? Ok, so that’s not nothing.”

“That’s a double negative.” Mac points out “On the second night, he kissed me and then nothing.”

“What is that about?” Sloan asked.

“I wish I knew.” Mac’s conversation with Sloan ends when her phone rings. “It’s my brother.” She tells Sloan who mouths ‘Hang Chews?’ at Mac who shakes her head and accepts the call “Pat, hi! Hang on…Sloan I can’t I need to make sure Will doesn’t kill himself with booze and a poor diet.”

**TBC… **


	19. Florida

Will tried to tune out Ben and Mackenzie’s excited chatter and just focus on the drive from the airport. He couldn’t quite figure out how Mac had convinced him to go on a family vacation with her. He’s fairly sure it’s the pleading look he’s powerless agianst mixed in with some emotional blackmail but here is, in a rented SUV driving down the Florida Turnpike to a rented holiday villa that he will be sharing with Mac, Ben and one of Mac’s brother’s with his family.

** _Flashback:_ **

_“Family vacation?” Will looked at Mac like she had an extra head. _

_“Yes.” She beamed at him “To Florida. My brother is taking his kids before the end of the summer holidays. It might be nice. Especially with Benny starting Pre-K.” _

_“Florida?” She definitely had an extra head. This extra head was doing all the thinking for her and it wasn’t the semi-logical head that normally did Mackenzie’s thinking._

_“Happiest place on earth.” She gave him her best puppy dog look and he felt his resolve breaking. _

_Happiest place on earth? That could only mean… “No.” Will had no desire to go to Disney World, there were crowds and people and so much happiness, he walked out of Mac’s office forgetting the reason he’d gone in there in the first place. _

_… … … … … … _

_“Ok Billy.” Mac put her hair in her usual ponytail and looked at him on the screen “You, me and Ben. 2 weeks in the sun at Disney.”_

_“Are you going to drop this?” He asks from the anchor desk_

_“Not until you say yes.”_

_“Mac…”_

_“Billy, it’s Ben’s first proper vacation, surely you want to be part of that?” She was bringing out the big guns. _

_“Fine.” She had him with the argument. He also wanted to keep pretending they were a family for a little bit longer. Mac had been with him for a week and a half and he knew she’d be going home eventually._

_“I knew you’d come around.” She smiled. _

_“10 seconds” Herb interrupted them. _

_“Good show Billy.” _

_“5, 4, 3…”_

_“By the way my brother is coming.” She dropped it just as the show was starting knowing Will wouldn’t have a chance to respond. She’s hoping that this vacation is what forces Will to finally decide on an answer to her question._

** _End Flashback_ **

They were meeting Mac’s twin brother Patrick, out of all her siblings Patrick was the one she was closest to. He supposed it came with being a twin and he’s fairly sure that if there were any McHale’s who knew the full circumstances of well, everything, then it would Patrick and that made him nervous.

“Billy!” Mac called out.

“Yeah?” He snapped back to reality and looked in the rear-view mirror at Mac.

“I’ve been talking to you for five minutes. I said Pat texted me and they’re going to Walmart, is there anything you need?”

“Nah I’m good.” He kept his eyes on the road.

“Billy are you ok?”

“Yeah.” He changed the tone to sound a little more engaged and less like there was anywhere he’d rather be than a rental car on a highway in Florida. “Hey, talk me through Pat’s family again.”

“He’s married to a nice guy, history professor. You’ve met him…”

“They’re still together?” Will was glad. He vaguely remembered meeting Patrick and his then boyfriend during a visit just before he and Mac got together. “How do you pronounce his name, it’s Irish or something?”

“Welsh Billy. They live in Wales. It’s pronounced Em-ear.” Mac chuckled “Pat, Emyr and their two boys. Dylan who is 7 and Evan is 4.”

“Right.” He tried to commit it to memory.

“I’m sure you’ll figure it out.” The conversation ended when the GPS pinged up with some further instructions

… … … … … …

They arrived at the villa and wandered around. Mac immediately selecting bedrooms for them all (separate bedrooms for her and Will, the first time they’d be sleeping separately in nearly 2 weeks but she had to get used to it again) and began unpacking whilst Will and Ben checked out the villa and the pool area.

“Hello!” A very English voice called out.

“Pat!” Mac came rushing down the stairs and hugged her brother who picked her up and spun her around. “Where are those nephews of mine?” She asks him.

“They are being put to work unpacking the shopping. What about my nephew?”

“He’s somewhere with Will.”

“Will.” Pat raised an eyebrow “So how’s that’s going?”

“How’s what going?” All Mac could think was deflect.

“Moved home yet?” Pat fired back

Any smart ass remark that Mac intended to make was ruined by a small torpedo named Ben rushing in and tackled her legs. “Hi Mummy.”

“Hi Benny. Do you want to say hi to Uncle Pat?” Mac asked him and he shook his head.

“Come on Benny, we talk on Skype all the time, you know me! Shall we get some pop?” He asks Ben who nods shyly.

They walk into the kitchen and find Will helping Emyr and the kids put the shopping away.

“Ah there he is!” Patrick calls happily “The greater fool!” Mac smacks him in the arm and smiles apologetically at Will.

… … … … … …

“You know I saw the article. It’s a crock of shit.” Emyr walks outside where Will had been sat getting some peace and quiet away from the mini-McHale reunion and more of Pat’s little digs about Brian’s article. He hands Will a beer.

“Yeah.” Will agreed taking the beer but not saying much else.

“I thought you’d be out here. Close as you’ll get to your balcony.” Mac chirped cheerfully as she and Patrick joined them, sitting in loungers near the pool and Will accepted that his brief alone time was clearly over. Mac notices the beer in his hand and stares at him pointedly, he still wasn’t supposed to be drinking.

“I’m on vacation Mackenzie.” He says in answer to her unvoiced opinion. 

Mac tries to subdue it but Will is sure he heard her mutter something about not being able to take a vacation from being dead before announcing “Three over-excited children successfully asleep.” Mac and her brother clink their own beers.

“Without a shot of whiskey to boot.” Patrick flung himself in a lounger “Take that Mum and Dad.”

Mac stares at Will “You look like you’re brooding Billy.” She tilts her head “Nobody is supposed to brood the night before they go to Magic Kingdom!” Will just scowled at her in response. “Please tell me you’re not still thinking about the damn article!”

“Brenner’s article?” Patrick asked, “He always was a pretentious and bitter prick.” He took a swig of his beer “Never really understood why you were into him Kenzie” He looked at his sister. “I like your show Will.”

“Thanks.” Will quietly sipped his own beer.

“There’s no point trying to cheer him up. We’re just going to have to let him sulk.” Mac pointed out and Will just cocks an eyebrow in her direction and debates cutting a hole in the screen around the pool, if he’s luck an alligator will come in and eat him.

Emyr swigs from his beer “You know in the 12th Century King Henry II led a campaign to try and supress Wales…”

“Oh here he goes!” Patrick laughs “Lecture on the evils of the English incoming!”

“Shut up. Anyway, during one of his campaigns he had a conversation with an Elderly Welshman who told him ‘Never will it be destroyed by the wrath of man, unless the wrath of God be added, nor do I think that any other nation than this of Wales, or any other tongue, whatever may hereafter come to pass, shall on the day of the great reckoning before the Most High Judge, answer for this corner of the Earth.’” He paused to let it sink in.

“Right.” Will may not want a pep-talk but he was interested to see where this went.

“Basically this old guy told the King of England that no army of man was going to defeat Wales unless they had the wrath of God.” Will nodded to show we has listening. “There’s a song we sing about it, it’s called Yma O Hyd.”

“Bless you.” Patrick calls from his spot on the lounger

“Bellend.” Emyr shakes his head. “The line of the song is Ry’n ni yma o hyd. Er gwaetha pawb a phopeth”

“I literally have no idea what that means.” Will points out.

Emyr just laughs “It translates to we’re still here. Despite everything and everyone.”

“What are you trying to say?” Patrick asks his husband.

“It’s an allegory. Will likes allegories” Emyr points out. “Wales and the Welsh are still there and so are you and Newsnight. Despite the English and despite Brian”

“I mean personally I wouldn’t take life lessons from Welsh songs.” Patrick points out “This is a nation that loses it’s mind over a song about a saucepan.”

“Hey! Sospan Fach is a truly iconic song” Emyr points out. “Any English songs that you can think of that means the same thing.”

“Tubthumping. Chumbawamba.” Patrick says cockily.

“I know that one!” Mac calls out laughing.

“I get knocked down. But I get up again, you’re never going to keep me down.” Patrick speaks the lines in an over the top English accent and wiggles his eyebrows at Emyr as if to say your move.

“Dick head.” Emyr laughs and watches as Mac gets out of her lounger slips her shoes off and joins Will by the side of the pool, slipping her feet in the cool water. He catches Pat’s eyes and nods towards Will and Mac and then towards the villa indicating that they should give them some privacy.

“I’m sorry if Pat was on your case about the article today.” Mac places her hand on Will’s and he just shrugs intertwining their hands.

They sit in silence, holding hands and drinking their beers in silence until eventually Will turns and looks at Mac. “I’m still here Billy.” She whispers and she leans forward and kisses him and is pleased when he returns the kiss.

They keep kissing stopping only to throw their beer bottles in the bin. She leads him to the bedroom she’d selected for him and allows herself to be pushed on the bed. They keep kissing for a little while but don’t go any further. She’d like it to, but she’s got a plan which doesn’t involve scaring him by pushing him too far too quickly.

… … … … … …

“Hey Benny?” Pat asks walking into the front room where all three kids are watching TV waiting for the grown ups to get them up and take them to Disney.

“Hmm?” Ben looks over at his uncle.

“Do you know where your Mummy is? She wasn’t in room is she awake?” Pat asks.

Ben thinks for a second before stating “Sweep ober with Daddy.” At which point he turns his attention back to the TV.

Patrick is totally shocked. “Do uh… Mummy and Daddy have lots of sleep-overs?”

“Yeah.” Again, Ben not realising the magnitude of the information he’s passing.

Patrick turns and walks out of the room carrying the mug of coffee he’d made for Mac to the kitchen drinking it himself as he makes two fresh ones for Will and Mac and goes off in search of his sister.

He knocks the door and after receiving no answer pushes it open. As uncomfortable as it is he can’t help but smile. His sister asleep clearly wearing a t-shirt that belongs to Will cuddled into his side a contented smile on her face. He quietly walks in places the coffees on the bedside table and sneaks back out. Although for good measure he slams the door as he leaves.

They both jerk awake and sit up.

“Morning.” Will smiles at her.

“Morning Billy.”

**TBC… **


	20. Vacation

Will’s day started well. He woke up wrapped up in Mackenzie after taking a massive step forward with her the night before, they’d had a fantastic breakfast cooked by Mackenzie’s brother who happens to be a professional chef and they’d also managed to wrangle three excited kids in to the car (Pat and Emyr having the foresight to rent a minivan).

Now however, as he’s stood in the queue at the turnstiles to enter Magic Kingdom he remembers why he never wanted to come to Disney World in the first place. There’s crowds of people, over excited children and it’s already 80 degrees at 9am.

“Billy.” Mac touches his arm lightly and he looks at her “Try to scowl less.” He realises that she’s right and it only takes a glance at Ben to realise that just because he thinks that Disney is the worst place in the world, to a three year old it’s truly a magical place and he can’t help but smile as Mac places a pair of mouse ears she purchased from a stall outside the entrance on Ben’s head. They go through the turnstiles and as they walk on to Main Street USA Ben’s mouth drops and as they walk towards Cinderella’s castle his head moves from left to right taking everything in until suddenly, he stops.

“Daddy!” He points in the direction of a queue of people and Will follows where his son is pointing as Ben whispers reverently “Mickey”

Mac tries to stifle a laugh as Ben drags Will towards the queue of people waiting for Mickey Mouse. “You should get in the photo.” Pat says from behind them and pushes them towards Mickey as Ben runs up to him, Pat tosses Mac the plastic bag that contains two more pairs of mouse ears and she grins. She gently nudges Will towards the Mouse and quickly stands on tip toes places the ears on his head.

“Smile for the camera Will.” She laughs and they pose for a family photo before swapping with Patrick and Emyr so they can have a photo with their boys.

Will goes to pull the ears off his head (god forbid anyone recognises him) but stops when Ben tugs on his shorts leg “No Daddy.” He looks at him sadly “Matching.” Ben may have his eyes but the look he gives is 100% Mackenzie and Will finds himself spending an entire day walking around Disney with a pair of ridiculous mouse ears on his head.

Shortly after lunch the first tell tale drops of rain that signal the start of an afternoon storm fall, followed by the first rumblings of thunder. Soon enough they’re making a dash for the first indoor attraction they can find which happens to be the Hall of Presidents. Mac slips into a seat next to Will slips her pocket and she takes a look at the message she’d received earlier.

**From Sloan Sabbith:**

**Is this your doing?**

Mac smiles at the accompanying picture, it’s from one of the online gossip sites and it’s a photo of Will holding the bags, Ben and Evan (thankfully with their faces blurred) flanking him on both sides and eating popcorn and all three with matching mouse ears.

**From Mackenzie**

**Ben actually. Total guilt trip.**

**It was something to behold. **

**From Sloan Sabbith**

**You taught him well. **

**From Mackenzie: **

**I don’t know what you’re **

**talking about.**

**From Sloan Sabbith:**

**So… How is Will? **

**How’s the Will situation going?**

**From Mackenzie:**

**Can’t talk now. **

**Learning about US History.**

The show starts and as the voice over starts explaining the history of the show Mac shuffles closer to Will who reaches an arm behind her and tightens his grip on Ben who is sat in his lap as they watch the show. When it finishes Will gently nudges Ben awake and stands reaching a hand out to Mackenzie taking her hand and not letting go of it for the majority of the rest of the day.

… … … … … …

“Admit it.” Mac tells him as she’s tucked up on the end of couch, they’ve put an exhausted Ben to bed. Her brother and Emyr are also fast asleep in their room and it’s just the two of them left awake. They have always been able to handle being tired a little better than most people.

“Admit what?” He asks sipping a beer.

“You had fun today.” Mac laughs. “Grumpy Will McAvoy had fun at Disney World.”

“I’m not grumpy.” Will grumps. “Where did you get the idea that I’m grumpy from?”

“Focus groups, it’s not important…” Mac sips her own beer.

“There’s focus groups that say I’m grumpy?”

“Not important right now Will.” She stares him out.

“Fine. But we’ll be coming back to that.” He concedes. “I had fun today.” He admits and she smiles.

“I’m glad.” She means it.

“Tell me we’re not going back.” He pleads and she laughs.

“Not to Magic Kingdom but there’s more Disney Parks, Universal, Sea World, Busch Gardens, Kennedy Space Centre and the Mall…”

“I feel like I’ve been tricked.” Will says “There wasn’t any mention of shopping.”

“Relax Billy. Pat and Emyr are taking the boys in a few days. We have different plans.”

“You’re passing up an opportunity to shop?”

“One time only deal Billy. I won’t be making a habit of it.” She laughs.

“What’s making Mackenzie McHale give up a shopping trip?” He asks.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” She finishes her beer and saunters out of the room leaving him confused on the couch.

“Well yeah!” He calls after her. “That’s why I asked!” He yells to nobody. “Mac!”

… … … … … …

They wake the next morning the same as they have every day, together in bed but far apart in every way that counts. Mac knew he was working on whatever was going on his head but she knew that whilst he’d probably get there on his own, he normally needed a little prodding. It’s why, when he agreed to come on this holiday (not that she knew how she’d convinced him to do that) she found she had the perfect opportunity to give him that nudge.

“Morning Billy.” She reaches up and cups Will’s jaw with her hand.

He smiles, he likes waking up like this. He just needs to find a way to tell her “Good Morning.”

“You need to get up.” She tells him as she slides out of the bed and walks away from him towards the en-suite. She slept in just a t-shirt that she stole from him and she sashay’s away from knowing full well that his gaze will be drawn to her legs.

“Yes dear” Will grouses as, predictably he watches whilst she walks away.

Will is finally getting up when Ben comes running in to the room and dives on to the bed.

“Ooof!” Ben lands on Will’s stomach.

“Wake up Daddy!” He yells.

“I’m awake.” Will tells him. “What’s the plan for today Benny?”

“Swimming!” Ben yells

“Water Park Billy.” Mac comes back from the bathroom in the shortest shorts Will has ever seen, they were on the very limit of indecent, she had on a linen shirt and he could see the knot of her bikini strap poking out the back of her collar as she turns to put her hair up in the mirror.

“Daddy.” Ben pokes his staring father and gets no response “Daddy.” He pokes him again “Daddy!” He yells as he pokes him repeatedly.

“Will!” Mac joins her son in trying to get Will’s attention.

“Yeah.” Will snaps out of it and Mac fights to hide the smirk.

“Ben.” She nods towards her.

“You want something buddy?” Will asks

“Bweakfast.” He stands and starts jumping on the bed.

“Don’t jump on the bed honey.” Mac lifts him off the bed and places him on the floor “We’ll let daddy get dressed.” She leads him from the room.

… … … … … …

“Come on Billy.” Mac reaches out a hand towards him and he sits up from where he’s lying on the faux beach and tries not stare as she stands in front of him in a bikini. They’d spent an exhausting morning running round the water park trying to ride as much as possible before lunch. Pat and Emyr were taking them on another round of the park.

“Where are we going?” She pulls him to his feet.

“To reax.” She keeps hold of his hand as she leads him down to the castaway creek and laughs as he tries repeatedly to snag a two person inflatable ring and nearly doubles over in hysterics as he falls in the water trying to get on it.

“This is not my idea of relaxing.” He grumbles as they’re both finally in the float and Mac just laughs at him.

Although, he is wiling to admit that perhaps she was right and this is pretty relaxing as they float slowly round the river with Mac leaning against his chest, Will’s arms are on the side of the float and cautiously he moves them round her waist cuddling her against him. He frowns as he feels a patch a rough skin.

“Pakistan.” She says in answer to his unasked question.

“Sorry.” He mumbles.

“For what?” She asks

“I don’t know. I didn’t mean for you to get hurt.” He confesses.

“Not physically anyway.” Mac says quietly and Will can’t help but agree. Sure he didn’t want her to get physically hurt but emotionally he wanted her to hurt as much as he did. “Will it’s not your fault. You didn’t make me go to Pakistan.”

He’s not sure he agrees and is about to respond when they’re distracted by an excited yelling from the path running down the side of the attraction “Mummy!” The excited voice calls out “Daddy!” They look over and see Ben bouncing excitedly on the side with his uncles and cousins, Pat raises an eyebrow at the position they’re sat in.

They float for a little while longer before getting off after their fourth lap of the park once it starts raining. They manage to catch up with Mac’s family right as the announcement comes over the park that all outdoor and water are closed for the duration of the storm.

“Everything is an outdoor and water attraction.” Will points out and Mac laughs “Why not just say that we’re closed?” They run through the rain back to the car.

“Daddy?” Ben whispers, jumping as there’s another crack of lightning near-by. “Scawy” his bottom lip starts to tremble.

“Scared of the lightning?” Will asks and Ben nods. “It’s ok Benny. Lightning isn’t scary, we’ve got Mommy to look after us…” He points towards Mac “…Mommy’s the bravest person in the whole world and she’ll look after us.”

… … … … … …

“Feel like clueing me in on your plan Mac?” Will asks as they sip coffee by the pool. They’d had a relaxed start to their day. Pat, Emyr and the boys had gone to the mall.

“Not yet.” She picks at the bowl of fruit she’s eating and he scowls at her. “Just be ready to go in an hour or so.”

An hour later they’re leaving with Mac still remaining tight lipped about their plans. Mac’s in the driving seat and Will can’t help but feel a little afraid he’s still absolutely terrified of Mac’s driving.

“We’re going to Tampa?” He questions after realising that she was following signs for Tampa. “What’s in Tampa?”

“Baseball.” She says happily.

“Baseball?”

“Baseball.” She says again. “Tampa Bay Rays and the Yankees.”

“You hate baseball.”

“About as much as you hate everything we’ve done on this holiday. If you can suffer through Disney World, I can make it through one baseball game.” She tells him. “How long can a game last anyway?”

Will doesn’t have the heart to tell her the average length of the game is a little over 3 hours. Mac will figure it out but he appreciates the gesture.

He was right, Mac did figure out that a baseball game was much longer than she expected and whilst at the start she’d enjoyed the beers and various other ballpark snacks soon she was bored and fast asleep snoring lightly against his shoulder. Mac jerked awake as the home fans cheered their teams victory.

“I fell asleep” She moans as she rubs her eyes.

Will laughs “Ben normally falls asleep by the fifth inning. You at least made it to the top of the seventh.”

“I wanted us to spend some time together.” She shakes her head and mumbles as she gets up “It’s not a great date if someone falls asleep.”

“A date?” He looks at her and she looks back a little panicked, she hadn’t meant for him to hear.

“Yeah.” She sits back down “I know you’re working on things but I thought it might be nice for us to go on a date. Get to know each other again”

“A date.” He repeats. “Ok.” He nods and Mac’s suddenly nervous, perhaps her plan of taking him on a date without him realising wasn’t the best idea. “You could’ve just asked.”

“Would’ve you have said yes?” She couldn’t quite believe it would’ve been that simple.

“I don’t know.” He looks at his watch. “It’s getting late. We should really get back, the kids won’t want dinner too late.”

“Pat and Emyr are sorting dinner. They’re going to Medieval Times.”

“Sounds like hell.” Will admits

“I figured you’d say that. We’ve got reservations in Ybor City.” She shuffles uncomfortably “If you want to go.”

Will stays quiet for a moment. “Sure.” He reaches a hand back out to her and she smiles when he leads her out of the stadium without letting go.

When they arrive at the restaurant they’re shown to a quiet table and they stay silent as they’re seated, as they read the menus and are served their drinks and appetisers.

“This is awkward right?” Mac asks as she picks at her food.

“Yeah.” Will agrees

“I don’t understand why.” She points out “We’re friends right?”

“Yeah” Will agrees “We’ve know each other for years.”

“We’ve got a kid!” Mac laughs

“We live together.” Will points out.

“Do we?” Mac asks

Will shrugs

“That’s not an answer Will.” Mac says sadly.

“Mac, let’s not…”

“Not what?” She pushes

“Ruin the moment” Will shrugs

“I wouldn’t have to if you weren’t avoiding the question.” The exasperation evident in her voice

“I was a good guy.” Will responds

“I never said you weren’t but Billy…”

“You kind of did.” Will points out “And I’m trying Mac. I really am trying to be a good guy again.”

“I sense a but coming.”

“What I want is you and Ben with me.” Will admits finally. “Like a family.”

“Whose stopping you?”

“You are.” He finally admits.

“Well that makes no sense Billy.” Mac throws her hands up in exasperation

“I was a good guy.”

“So you keep saying.” Mac doesn’t even try to conceal her exasperation

“You cheated on me.”

“I know and there isn’t a second that goes by where I don’t regret it.”

“I broke up with you.” Will states and holds up a hand “And I wish you hadn’t told me.”

“I know Will.” This was definitely not how Mac had planned the date.

“I love you.” He says

“Sorry, what?” She can’t have heard him right.

“I said I love you.” Will says it with more confidence “I think pretending I don’t doesn’t work.”

“What are you trying to say?”

“I love you. You need to know that.” He says with some finality

“I still sense a but.” She’s smiling, it’s mostly nerves.

“I want to try Mac.”

“Try what?” Mac tries not to get hopeful

“Being a family.” Will admits. “But…”

“Ah. There it is.” Her hope comes crashing down on her like a ton of bricks.

Will shrugs “But…” He lets the words trail off and he recalls the conversation he had with his sister and the story she told him about the little boy who shreds paper. “I need to stop shredding paper.” He says more to himself than to her.

“But nothing. I love you Mac.” He says it with more confidence this time and looks at her. “I want you and Ben to stay. When we go home. Don’t go back to your place, in fact I don’t even want there to be a your place.”

“I’m totally lost right now.” Mac can’t follow his train of thought.

“I love you.” He tells her again.

“So you’ve said. Five times now.” She allows herself a little smile.

“I want us to work on this together.”

“OK Billy.”

**TBC… **


	21. Slow

Sloan slides in-to the booth next to Mac. “So…” she says as she places Mac’s drink in-front of her.

“So what?” Mac asks, she’s aware of what Sloan wants to know but she’s going to make her work for it.

“So last time we were sat here, you were telling me how you were planning on dragging Will on family vacation and getting him to admit he still loves you.”

“Hmmm.” Mac sips her drink.

“How did it go?” Sloan asks.

“How did what go?”

“You’re doing this on purpose.” Sloan shoots a look.

“We kissed.” Mac finally admits.

“Well that’s progress.” Sloan says encouragingly “You’ve kissed before though right?”

“Well there was lots of kissing when we were together.” Mac smiles thinking back to when things were far less complicated and all she had to worry about was whether or not she should tell him about Brian.

“I would have hoped he kissed you before he knocked you up.” Sloan fires back without missing a bet “But, that’s not what I’m asking and you know it.”

“Valentine’s. He kissed me on Valentine’s day.” Mac reminds her.

“And during one of your sleep-overs” Sloan reminds her “Was there more than kissing?” Mac shakes her head.

“So what happened then?”

“We kissed one night. A lot actually and then a few days later he told me loves me”

“Wow! I don’t’ get it, why are you sat here and not home jumping each others bones?” Sloan puts her drink down and takes Mac’s hand “Kenzie. Seriously, why are you still here?”

Mac shrugs “He said he wants to take it slow.”

“I don’t understand.”

“We went on a date, he told me he loves me, we came home and things are exactly the same.” Mac throws back her drink

“Well not exactly…” Sloan points out.

“Mmm. We go home, he tells me loves me and we go to bed.”

“No wonder Will never seems to get a second date.” Sloan finishes her own drink. “So, are you guys back together?”

“I honestly have no idea.” Mac stood to get her own drink.

… … … … … …

Will hears the click clack of Mac’s heel’s as she walks into his apartment, he turns and looks at her as she walks closer. “Hi.” He smiles at her.

“What are we?” She asks him.

“Hi, honey how was you day?” He scoffs.

“We work in the same place Will, I know how your day was.” Mac sits next to him on the couch. “I’m serious, I’ve asked the question before Will and don’t you dare tell me that you’re working on it.”

“Mackenzie, I love you.” Will takes her hand.

“So you keep telling me.” She says softly. “I still feel like I’m waiting for the hammer blow. ‘I love you Mackenzie but I don’t want to be with you’”

“Jesus Mac, no.” The panic creeps in “I want us to be together, I want us to be family. I just want it take it slow.”

“Slow. So should I move home?” She tries not to let her excitement at hearing him say he wanted them to be together distract her from the conversation they should really be having.

“No.” Will’s pretty firm on that one “I want you here.”

“Ok. That’s not really slow is it?” She smiles and he shrugs.

“Come to dinner with me tomorrow?” He offers in lieu of responding.

“Sophie’s not here, I don’t know if we’ll get a babysitter on a day’s notice.” She smiles, she hasn’t said no.

“I’ll sort it.” Will tells her

“You?”

“Yeah.” He says with confidence and Mac laughs. He stands and holds out a hand “Let’s go to bed.”

… … … … … …

“Me?” Sloan looks at him confused

“Yeah. He likes you.” Will tells her.

“I literally know nothing about that.” She points out.

“You have two PhD’s.” He tries.

“Neither of those are in babysitting.” 

“You’ll be fine.” Will waves a hand dismissively

“You say that like I’ve agreed to babysit.” Sloan looks at him over the top of her glasses.

“Five extra minutes.” He throws out and sits back comfortably. “That’s 10 minutes of economic news on Prime Time television.”

“Mackenzie will never agree.” She’s cautious. The offer is tempting.

“Managing. Editor.” He leans back in the chair.

“Deal. Unless you don’t stick to your end of the bargain McAvoy.” Sloan goes back to looking at her computer screen whilst Will figures out how to get this one past Mac.

… … … … … …

“No.” Mac looks at Will like he’s grown an extra head.

“I’m the managing editor Mac and I want to do it.”

“You want to give up the last 10 minutes of the show to Sloan so she can talk about the economy.”

“Yes.” He doesn’t get why she isn’t getting it.

“No.”

“Mac, it’s just a new segment. ‘Sloan’s Friday Wrap Up’” He’s thinking on his feet now. “It links with her show, potentially giving her a boost and then it’s more cross network stories which keeps the Lansing’s happy…”

“But Terry isn’t happy when we lose her lead in…”

“And I think you’re missing the key point here Mac.” He tells her ignoring her point about Terry’s lead in, she’s right he can’t help but think however, his date night plan depends on it.

“Am I?”

“Yeah. I know you phone it in during Sloan’s segment…” Perhaps it wasn’t the wisest thing he could say

“Phone it in?!”

“Yeah. You give us the timings but you don’t understand a single thing we’re talking about it.”

“Excuse me! I completely…” She knows he won’t believe her “Go on.”

“That 12 year old you’ve been dragging around since the Green Zone…”

“Your exceedingly competent senior producer Jim Harper.” She throws in.

“…is more than capable of covering for you for the last 10 minutes whilst you get ready for our date.” Will finishes.

“Oh.” Her eyes crinkle in a smile and Will knows he’s got her.

… … … … … …

Sloan carries a sleeping Ben out of the car and up to Will and Mac’s. Will told her that she can help herself to food or drink, she just needs to put Ben to bed. Sophie was out of town this weekend and Ben had initially been sleeping on the couch in Will’s office. Before leaving with Mac for their date he’d escorted them down to the car and put a sleeping Ben in her lap.

“Auntie Swoan?” A sleepy confused voice interrupts her as she lays him on his bed.

“Oh! Hi.” Sloan

“Where’s mummy and daddy?” His lip trembles.

“Oh no Benny don’t cry. Please don’t cry.” She panics slightly, she can cope with Ben when he’s being shy or talkative but not upset.

“Where’s my mummy and daddy?!” He demands

“On a date.” Sloan tells him, she doesn’t really know what to say to him other than the truth. “They’ll be here by the time you wake up.”

“What’s date?” He sits up.

“When two people really like each other they go out and…have fun just them.” She seems happy with her answer.

“Oh.” He ponders for a moment. “Autie Swoan?”

“Yeah?”

“Date with me?” He asks and looks at her with big pleading puppy dog eyes.

“Umm…. Ok.” She tells him

“Tomowo?” Still with the puppy dog eyes.

“Tomorrow. Ok.” He smiles and rolls over ready to sleep.

**TBC… **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick little chapter to set up date night


	22. Date Night

** _Mac and Will_ **

There’s a knock on Mac’s office door and she opens it and see’s Will stood there wearing a slightly nicer suit than he had on during the broadcast, one arm behind his back.

“Hi.” He smiles at her.

“Hi.” She steps back and lets him in to the office. “Benny and Sloan…”

“On their way home, we’re not talking about them tonight.” He cuts her off and moves his hand from behind his back and hands her the flowers.

“Tulips?” She looks at him “And something else, I’m not sure.”

“A declaration of love.” He shrugs. “The others are Anemone’s, they symbolise anticipation.” His nonchalance blows her away. “Are you ready for dinner?” He takes in her little black dress and lets his eyes linger over her legs before meeting her eyes and smiling “You look great honey.”

Honey. It’s been a long time since he called her that “Do I get to know where we’re going?” She asks

“No.” He places a hand on the small of her back and leads her from her office through the bullpen. If any of the staff notice they ignore them, it’s hard to keep up with the shifts back and forth in the relationship of their bosses.

Mac decides not to push Will on the issue of their dinner plans until she realises that the car is driving away from Manhattan and towards the East River. “We’re going to Brooklyn.”

“Hmmm.” Will hums in agreement and still refuses to give anything away.

“What’s in Brooklyn?” She asks and Will takes her hand and says nothing, it infuriates her but, she’s going to let him have his secrets.

The surprise it turns out is a little Italian Restaurant that appears to be totally empty. “I never thought I’d see the day when Will McAvoy was in Williamsburg, surely this is all a little too hip for you?”

He laughs “It wasn’t so hip when I lived here when I worked for the DA in the 80’s” He helps her out of the car and again he places her hand on his back as he leads her in to the restaurant.

“Well, well, well if it ain’t the great Will McAvoy” A voice in a strong New York accent calls out and walks towards them and stands in front of him hands on his hips and stares at Will for a few seconds before both men laugh and the stranger goes in for a hug, which Mac is surprised to see Will return.

“Mac, this Frankie Russo. A friend from back in my DA days, his father for some unknown reason decided to trust this reprobate with his pride and joy.” He indicates to the room they were in.

“I was a cop who had to deal with this absolute punk of a new ADA stickin’ his nose in to all our business. Drove me insane.” Frankie tells them

“I know the feeling.” Mac laughs

“Anyways, one day I come to help my pops at the restaurant and there’s the asshole tuckin’ into a lasagne. We’d been arguing over the case for weeks.” Frankie goes behind the bar and pulls out a bottle of red wine and a few glasses and my father comes over and says…”

“Cesco, have you met Bill? He works in law enforcement as well.” An Italian voice calls out and an elderly man comes out of the kitchen and finishes the story and goes immediately over to Will and pulls him into a hug as well. “I make Frankie wait on this stunad and by the end of the evening they’re best of friends.”

“Gio!” How have you been I thought you’d retired?” Will asks

“Cesco called and told me that Bill McAvoy is coming to dinner and he’s finally bringing the lovely Mackenzie we used to hear about and that seems like a special enough occasion so you sit drink the wine and I cook your favourite Lasagne.”

“Yeah and then this guy moves down to DC and starts writing speeches for the President, he comes back and moves to Manhattan and suddenly he don’t come round here no more. Starts supporting the yankees as well.” Frankie shakes his head in disappointment “What the Mets not good enough for you?”

“The Mets have never been good.” Will fires back.

“I know you got a boy of your own now. You better not be teachin’ him any of that shit.” Frankie tells him seriously.

“Cesco let Bill and the lady sit down.” He waves a hand and goes back to the kitchen.

“So a few days ago this guy…” He points to Will as he leads them to a table “Calls me up and says Frankie, any chance you’ll open a bit later on a Friday night. I got a date and I need to impress her. It’s caused quite the stir.” Frankie places the wine and glasses on the table. “Luca may be round at some point, he wants to thank you in person.” He walks away and towards the kitchen.

“Well that was an experience.” Mac laughs as Will pours them some wine.

“Frankie’s family basically adopted me when I lived here. I’ve had many a family dinner on a Sunday at the Russo house, Thanksgivings and Christmas as well.”

“So what happened?”

“We keep in touch but we drifted apart a little, I burnt out working in the DA’s office and needed a fresh start I needed to get out of Brooklyn.”

The conversation continues about Will’s time living in Brooklyn and once they finish their food, Will insists on going back to the kitchen to talk to Gio. Frankie comes over and takes the seat he vacated.

“He talks about you all the time you know.” He tells Mac. “He turned up on my doorstep one night tells me that he just broke up with the love of his life.” She’d always wondered where he went the night that he walked out the apartment after she told him about Brian. “I’m glad he found you again, tonight is the first night I’ve seen him genuinely smile in years.”

“That’s all my fault.” She says softly “I hurt him, he’s a good guy and he didn’t deserve it.”

“He’s the best.” Frankie smiles sadly. “I got shot, I mean it’s not as bad as being stabbed but it wasn’t great ya know?”

“You know about that?”

“Yeah. When you got stabbed he turned up in the middle of the night again said he thought he’d killed you and he screwed it all up.” That surprised her.

“When I got shot it ended my career and Bill took on the case as the district attorney who prosecuted the guy and it damn near killed him to get that conviction. He left the DA’s office after that.”

“He’s fiercely protective of his family.” Mac tells him.

“I can’t blame him.” Neither say out loud what they know about what Will went through as child.

“Dad?” Another strong New York accent calls out and the owner of the voice walks over to Frankie and Mac.

“Mac, this is my boy Luca.” Frankie points to the tall teenager “Luca this is Mac a friend of your uncle Bill’s.”

Will walks back over and slaps Luca on the back “More than a friend.” He smiles warmly at Mac who beams back at him.

“Uncle Bill, I just want to pop in quickly and say thank you in person.” He holds out a hand which Will takes and shakes “For helping me get the nomination.”

“My boy goes to the Navy Academy.” Frankie says with pride “Got nominated by the Vice President of all people. How an idiot like this…” He nudges Will with an elbow “…knows a guy like that, I don’t know but I’m not going to question it.”

The rest of the evening proceeds with more wine, laughter, stories of Will’s Brooklyn days and a Tiramisu that makes Mac think she’s died and gone to heaven. As they drive back to Will’s apartment, she places her head on his shoulder and he wraps an arm around her. “I saw a whole different side to you tonight Billy.” She says softly “I thought the only people who called you Bill were your family.”

“The Russo’s are family” Will rests his head on top of Mac’s “Will McAvoy wasn’t born until DC when the President, or rather candidate at the time thought that was my name and it stuck. Will had the reputation, Bill didn’t.” Mac makes no response and Will realises it’s because her eyes have closed and she’s sound asleep, he places a kiss on the top of her head.

… … … … … …

** _Ben and Sloan_ **

Mac makes the coffee in the morning and remembers coming home last night and talking to Sloan.

_Flashback _

_“So apparently I have a date tomorrow.” Sloan tells her as she’s leaving. “Ben wants to take me on a date.” Mac laughs at it. _

_“You don’t have to go.” Mac tells her._

_“Oh no. I agreed to go on a date with him and I keep my promises.” Sloan smiles. “So I’ll see you tomorrow.” _

_“See you tomorrow.” Mac laughs “I’ll let you know a time and place.” _

_“Plans with Sloan tomorrow?” Will comes up behind her. _

_“Oh not me. Your son.” She tries and fails to keep a straight face “Apparently he asked Sloan on a date.” _

_“That’s my boy” Will laughs. _

_End Flashback _

“Benny!” Will calls and Ben comes running into the kitchen “We need to have a serious man to man chat.” Ben looks at his father worried. “We also need to get your ready for your date with Auntie Sloan.” Ben smiles at his father and Mac smiles at the pair of them.

An hour later Mac, Will and Ben are outside an Applebee’s waiting for Sloan.

“Now this, this is a classy establishment.” Sloan appears next to them on the street. “They do an excellent burger.”

“Hi Auntie Swoan.” Ben mumbles and holds out the Daisies they bought on the way.

“Thank you Benny. You look sharp, those are some cool sneakers.” Ben beams back at her and bounces on his heels to light up his sneakers.

They go into the restaurant and Will asks for two tables for two, as they’re walking over to their respective tables Sloan grabs Will’s arms. “I want a burger.”

“Then order a burger.” He tells her.

“I can’t” She tells him

“Says who?” He looks at her stupid.

“We’re near Times Square.” Sloan tells him like he’s stupid. “There’s tourists and you know what tourists have?”

“I’m sure you’re going to tell me.”

“Cameras William. I can’t order that tasty tasty Bacon Cheeseburger but you can and I want it as take-out because I’m on a date with your three year old…”

“You could’ve said no.” Will points out.

“And crushed his little heart? No thank you. You owe me, so I want it as take-out” 

Further conversation is stopped by Ben tapping on Will’s leg “Daddy? Auntie Swoan is my date.” He says assertively.

“Yeah she is buddy. I’m sorry.” He leaves Ben and Sloan to their date and goes over to Mac. He laughs and shakes his head. “The boy knows what he wants and apparently so does Sloan.”

“Mmmm.” Mac hums in agreement. “She wants a triple chocolate cake thing.”

“As take-out?” He asks

“Yeah.” Mac laughs “The tourists?”

“Hmmm.” Will agrees.

… … … … … …

“So, Benny what do you do for work?” Sloan asks and Ben laughs.

“Don’t work Auntie Swoan.”

“What do you do for fun?” Sloan asks him.

“Cawtoons”

“You watch cartoons? What’s your favourite?”

“Peppa!” Benny shouts excitedly.

“That’s the pig one right?” Sloan asks him and Ben launches it into an explanation all about Peppa Pig and her friends only stopping when his chicken tenders arrived.

Eventually the waiter comes over and asks them about the bill, when it comes Sloan goes to pull out her credit card to pay the bill when Ben stops her. “No Autie Swoan.”

“No?”

“Daddy says to be a…a…” He thinks for a few seconds “Gengleman” He seems happy with his answer and Sloan doesn’t have the heart to correct his pronunciation. “Daddy says gengleman pay.” He then pulls out a Toy Story wallet and takes out one black credit card.

“Is that your dads?” Sloan asks him and Ben nods. “If I knew you had that, we could’ve had a lot of fun this afternoon.” Ben just shrugs in response

They eventually leave the restaurant and Sloan hands Ben back to his parents and she smiles at him. “Thanks for lunch Benny. You were a real Ggengleman.” She crouches and gives him a peck on the cheek goes to get in the cab and then looks at Mac and Will expectantly “I had a salad.”

“Right.” Will hands her the bag of take-out.

“Thanks.” She checks the bag. “Bacon cheeseburger?” Will nods.

**TBC...**


End file.
